backward dreams
by Asakami
Summary: He's here, she's here. Yet, uncertainty. Tomoya/Kotomi. Sequel to AF,DB. Graphic. Lemon
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Kotomi-chan!"

The girl spun around, her purple hair swaying with her movement. She smiled at the sight; her friends were here to pick her up.

"Kyou-chan, Ryou-chan, Tomoyo-chan, Sunohara-san," she paused. She was disappointed for not being able to see what she wanted to see for all these years, but she quickly shook her distressing look away, for she is now reuniting with her best of friends, "… it's been so long,"

Kyou ran forward and embraced the girl, "Yeah! It's been so long!"

"You rarely called!" The younger Fujibayashi twin commented.

"And you're rarely online," the grey hair girl added, "I can use just one hand to count the times we've chatted for all these years!"

"What!? Kotomi-chan has an email address? She has a phone there!?" the blonde shouted at the girls, turning slowly to the popular girl, "How come nobody ever told me!?"

The girls laughed. Kotomi giggled, it was nice to speak and listen to Japanese again; the English language she spoke so often was slowly depressing her.

Kyou choked, "Didn't your buddy tell you about it?"

"No! He told me nothing about it!" Sunohara complained.

"He must've been afraid that you wouldn't stop bothering her…"

"Or that you would steal her away from him… knowing Tomoya, he's always so protective over his possessions."

_Possessions._

Kotomi tried not to make it obvious that she was annoyed, she made the most cheerful face she possibly could, "Say, Kyou-chan, where is Tomoya-kun? He never told me that he wasn't going to pick me up…"

The group went silent. They eyed each other strangely, as if something awkward happened.

"Kotomi…" Tomoyo started, "he never told you?"

"…"

"Okazaki always has classes today until late at night… something to do with a lab and study session… he told us beforehand to pick you up because he can't make it…"

The group saw Kotomi's expression slowly getting upset. She most definitely did not change at all; she still is the same old Ichinose Kotomi— vulnerable, shy, cute, quiet.

"… don't worry about that, Kotomi-chan!" the younger twin said happily, "I'm sure he'll make it up to you!"

She forced a smile on her face.

"… at the same time, we're going to take you out tonight!" Tomoyo tried desperately to make her cheerful again.

Kotomi looked up, maintaining her forced smile, "Thanks… what are we going to do?"

"Clubbing." Kyou said proudly, "We're going to go clubbing. You're legal now, we're all legal now, so—"

"That's great!" Kotomi interrupted, "I've been to many clubs in America, but back then I was too young to go to the clubs in Japan… it's great that you brought it up!"

The group once again eyed each other, and then Kotomi strangely. They were wrong; their one and only, cute, innocent little Ichinose Kotomi has actually grown up.

"Err…" Sunohara broke the silence, "well then! Let's not just stand around here like idiots! We'll bring your stuff to your house first, then you can change and all and— OW!"

Tomoyo slapped him hard across the back of his head, "Stop bringing up sick things,"

"What!" he snapped.

Kotomi giggled, "Sunohara-san, you're still the same,"

The blonde scratched his head, his face turning red, "Heh, you haven't changed either…"

Kyou turned to him, "No, you idiot, she changed _a lot_."

* * *

The ride home wasn't exactly "safe". The driver was horrible; the car kept swaying from side to side even though it was not raining nor was it snowing, and the stops were so bad it made all of the passengers feel sick.

"Damn it, Youhei! Why would you buy a car if you can't even drive!? You're making everybody sick! How are we going to have fun tonight?"

"Onee-chan…" Ryou, as usual, tried to calm her hyperactive sister down.

"Shut up! I can drive, I passed, alright!?" The blonde argued.

"Your examiner must've been stupid then," the grey hair girl commented bluntly, "I bet even Kotomi can drive better than a person like you— who has driven for how long? Three years?"

"Oh, please. How can Kotomi know how to drive? She never even took lessons—"

"… as a matter of fact…" the girl cut him off with a quiet voice.

"… you're shitting me."

"Shame," Kyou and Tomoyo said in unison.

"… My friend in New York is obsessed with cars… she gave me a few lessons for fun and that was how I learned how to drive," she explained. The other girls paid attention closely, "but then, driving in New York is really pointless; taking the cab is ten times faster… so I never drove ever since."

"Wow, does that mean you can't drive anymore?" The blonde asked happily.

"Shut up and drive." Tomoyo snapped at him, "Kotomi, continue,"

"There's… really not much to talk about…"

"The guys, what about the guys?" Kyou asked, biting onto her lower lip while smiling, "are they good looking?"

"Err…" she avoided eye contact with them, but she could feel her cheeks getting warmer, "N-no…"

"Are you stupid!? Of course nobody's hotter than Okazaki!"

The girls widened their eyes, staring at the driver who was known to talk before he thinks.

"Uhh… to Kotomi-chan, of course," he laughed it off.

"Yeah…" the girls shook it off sarcastically.

Youhei made a turn, and they finally arrived at the house. Kotomi got off the car, and looked at her house that had no lights on. It looked dead. Though, she was extremely glad that she was home. She turned around to help the crew with her luggage. Once inside, they urged her to hurry up, for it was already ten at night; by the time they get down to the club it would be really cramped. Kotomi obeyed and ran upstairs to change, carelessly leaving her luggage at the doorway in her house.

Upon entering her own room, the familiar smell of the man she loves reached her nose. It was… so nostalgic. She misses talking with him, she misses being with him, she misses being held by him, she misses… being touched by him. She misses him so badly, but he's not here. She shook herself out of the depressing thoughts, and quickly stripped to put on more revealing, clubbing-appropriate clothes. Her side of the closet was kept very clean, unlike the other side, where clothes were stuffed carelessly everywhere— as if there was no time to tidy up. She knew this was going to happen but…

She took a good look around the room.

It was messier than the tomboys' rooms in the dorms back in America. Instead of frowning, or showing any signs of frustration, she shook her head and smiled. This was the way he boyfriend has always been. She wants to see him… she wants to see him.

Walking to the bed that was poorly made, she became surprised. It didn't even occur to her that he would put the effort in making the bed. She lied down, burying her face into the soft white pillow as if she was resting on his chest. She inhaled deeply; it was the smell of the shampoo she and her boyfriend used together. Oh god, she even misses bathing with him.

"Tomoya-kun…" she whispered. She wants his touch, she wants him. She wants _him. _

"Kotomi-chan!" Ryou's voice called to her; they were getting impatient, obviously. She fixed her clothes up a bit quickly, and exits the room, taking one more look at the room before shutting the lights off.

* * *

"So where are we going?"

"Roppongi," Kyou answered.

"But… that's really far…"

"Don't worry!" The blonde said cheerfully, "with my godly driving skills, we'll get there in no time!"

"Oh man…" Tomoyo sighed, "Your godly driving skills will get all of us killed if you don't pay attention on the streets. We should've just taken the bus…"

The trip to Roppongi, a district in Tokyo that is popular for night clubs, from her house, would take approximately an hour. The group chatted away the hour easily; talking about each others' career and plans for the future, also the past. Once the topic got close to missing high school, Sunohara immediately thought of something else, to prevent any sad memories from surfacing. The truth is, everybody wants to go back to high school, but mentioning it just hurts a lot.

Finally arriving, they found the streets crowded with people, as expected. It was a Friday night, party night, which means it's impossible to find a parking spot. Thinking for once, Youhei suggested, "Hey, why don't you ladies go in first? I'll join you when I find a spot."

"Ah, finally being considerate and thinking ahead!" the lavender hair girl taunted. She took Kotomi's hand and walked through the wide yet crowded streets. It was so hot, so loud, so full of people— reminds her so much of New York. They bumped into a few people here and there, she would politely apologize but none of them would pay attention. Tomoyo and Ryou followed closely behind, giggling at Kotomi's over-politeness, they told her that it was pointless to say sorry to people here— they'd be too drunk or busy to notice. Arriving at a bar, they walked down the steps to enter the underground doorway. "Alright, Kotomi-chan, you ready?"

She didn't even know why she had to ask, "Yes, of course," she replied, trying to sound excited.

Kyou opened the door, and the thundering music reached the girls' ears. They walked into the dark place. Occasionally, green, yellow, blue flashing lights shot into their eyes, blinding them momentarily. Yes, this was exactly like New York, except the songs played here were a bit more upbeat, making Kotomi want to get on the dance floor right away.

"There's a free table over there!" Tomoyo screamed to the girls, pointing at the corner of the bar. They squished through the people; in order to get to their destination, they had to get through the dance floor.

"Whew, that was hard." Ryou took a deep breath. "Kotomi-chan, do you want to drink or dance first?"

"Hold on! Don't let her drink! I don't think she's even dr—" the elder sister paused, turning her stare at her, "Kotomi… have you ever…?"

"Oh, of course. A friend of mine in New York is a bartender… every week the girls would go over to his house to enjoy the cocktails and other drinks he mixes."

Kyou shook her head, "You really have changed, Kotomi," she said it in a somewhat nonchalant way, yet there was some sort of disappointment in her tone. "Doesn't matter, EXCUSE ME!" she yelled at the top of her lungs, "CAN WE AT LEAST GET SOME SERVICE HERE PLEASE!?"

The girls chatted away as the drinks arrived. Kotomi watched and listened carefully to them; she didn't want to interrupt… after all, it's been four years and they haven't had a proper conversation with each other and she was afraid that if she said something, it would be awkward of everyone. As the girls talked, she took in the shots of vodka as if she was drinking pop.

Youhei arrived fifteen minutes later, just when the shot glasses arrived. He sat down, "Holy crap, it's impossible to find a parking spot here."

"We know. See, taking the bus was a much better idea…" Tomoyo said, "not only would we have arrived here safer and quicker, but you would also get to drink."

"Oh right… now I can't drink because I drove… ugh, so stupid!" The blonde grunted.

All these conversations her friends engaged in, Kotomi found very entertaining and interesting. As she was four years ago, where she couldn't find the right time to join in, she remained silent. Just listening to them was good enough. She giggled along with Ryou whenever Tomoyo or Kyou made playful remarks on Sunohara, and she laughed along whenever the blonde himself gives playful remarks to the girls. This was fun and all, but… she felt like a shell. Something's definitely missing.

"Kotomi, you're awfully quiet." Ryou commented.

The elder twin faked a sigh, "Obviously because we're not good enough for her…"

"No, no!" she shook her head, "That's not true, I'm just as happy—"

"She's only kidding," Tomoyo rested her hand on her shoulder as an attempt to calm her down, "Don't worry, Okazaki's going to make his way here right after his extra sessions or whatever."

A smile spread across her face, a relief rushed out of her heart, her mood instantly got better.

"See? Told you all she wanted to see was her man," Kyou said.

"Onee-chan, don't be so…"

"I'm kidding!" she laughed, "Kotomi, let's go dance!" Kyou stood up, grabbing the girl's hand, "Come on Ryou, Tomoyo! … and Youhei, sit here and watch our bags. If anything goes missing, I WILL KILL YOU."

The blonde gasped, no way in hell could he suffer from both Tomoyo and Kyou's strikes and blows. He obeyed and remained at the table. Then, it surprised him as he turned his head towards Kotomi's spot, where at least twenty empty shot glasses sat there. "Holy crap…"

The girls gathered together, moving to the rhythm of the music. Watching each other dance was a fun sight for the girl; Ryou danced awkwardly, obviously because she was hesitant to show her "woman" side, whereas Kyou and Tomoyo danced liked normal clubbers. The girls praised each others' moves, commenting on how sexy they are at the same time. Kotomi felt sweaty skins rubbing against hers', but this was expected; they are on the dance floor after all.

The music changed. The twins and Tomoyo decided to take a break.

"Kotomi-chan, we're going to take a break. Want to join?" Kyou had to shout to the girl to get her attention.

"No, it's alright, I want to continue dancing." She replied.

"Oh… okay then…" the girls started to head for their table. "Say, isn't her face a bit red?"

They approached their seats, "Is it because of the heat?" Tomoyo suggested.

"No, it's because of this," Sunohara pointed to the empty shot glasses. "I think Kotomi-chan over there, is really, really, _really_ drunk."

"Holy crap… what was it that we were drinking?" Kyou widened her eyes.

"I believe it's vodka," the blonde said as he sniffed the residue in a glass, "Man, that stuff's like forty percent, and plus… she had at least twenty,"

"But…" Ryou turned her head to the dance floor, searching through the crowd for a familiar purple-head, "she doesn't… _seem_ drunk…"

A concerned Tomoyo began to worry, "I think it's best we get her back here—"

"Hold on," Sunohara grabbed her hand. He pointed at the entrance of the club, a familiar face just walked in, "He'll do it for us,"

The girl was dead tired. She was so tired, but she can't stop dancing. She realized that if she goes back to the table where her friends are, she would have to put up a fake face to keep them from worrying about her. Even she knows that she is really bad with tolerating things she cannot stand… not that she can't stand her friends but, they're not really the ones she wants to hang out with right now. She wants someone else…

_She wants him…_

The music changed again, this time faster and even more upbeat than before. The stage lights dimmed down and it became hard to see the other people's faces that were around her. As the laser lights flashed and moved brilliantly, the people around her began to move more intensely. Kotomi herself began to dance more crazily.

Suddenly, a man who is about one and a half heads taller approached her. She couldn't see his face because of the darkness, but it was him. It was definitely him. She was so sure. He wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her towards him, "Hey there,"

It was either the music that was getting her high, or it was because of the alcohol. She followed the music's beat, rubbing her body against the man, up and down, up and down. She turned her body around so that her breasts were against his chest. He was obviously turned on as he slipped his hand under her short black skirt, then between her legs, rubbing her inner thigh. Kotomi wrapped her arms around the man's neck, resting her head on his shoulder. She moaned into his ear as he moved deeper in between her legs. She felt his fingers fiddle with the thin fabric of her panties, pushing it apart so that he could reach for her soaking core. Without warning, he thrust a finger into her. The girl threw her head back, "Tomoya-kun…!"

On the verge of passing out, somebody suddenly pulled her away from the incredible sensation. Her vision was blurred up, but she could vaguely hear something.

"Get the fuck away from her,"

A familiar voice.

"Yo, buddy, chill. She came to me." She could see the man walk away, and then she looked up at the man who was holding onto her.

Immediately after that, the man pulled her aside through the washroom hallway, and out into the dark alley. He backed her up against the wall, trapping her head in between his arms.

"Just what the fuck were you thinking?" he grunted, trying hard to keep his anger in.

"Tomoya-kun… take me back to Tomoya-kun…!" she whined as she tried to break free from him, but he held her down.

"What...?" he was confused.

"I love him… I love him…" she moaned repeatedly.

"What are you doing?! Kotomi!" he refused to let go of her despite the fact that she was struggling so hard, "I'm right here—!"

"No… please… take me back to him… I want to see him!"

"KOTOMI!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, trying hard to shake her out of her senses. "What the hell is wrong with you!?"

"Please… let go of me… I want Tomoya-kun…!"

Is this some kind of joke? This is pissing him off. Never in his life did he want to hit a woman so badly— and it's his own woman. Out of impulse and anger, he crushed her tiny frame harder, pinning her small wrists against the cement wall. He was so sure the rough surface gave her scratches, but it doesn't matter: he needs to punish this bitch… what was wrong with her? He's right here. She's calling to somebody else… but he's right here. He is so pissed off. He crashed on her lips so harshly it even hurt him.

Instantly, he could smell and taste the heavy alcohol. He pulled away quickly, realizing that she was broken. More evidence of her wasted status appeared on her face… why didn't he notice before? Her face was completely red, she couldn't open her eyes and looked extremely exhausted, and she was… she was still…

"… so beautiful." He whispered in admiration. He released her wrists, and moved his hands down to her breasts, feeling, touching, squeezing them. He hasn't touched her for so long; it got him so hard when he felt her softness. He watched as she moaned softly, still trying hard to push him away.

"Stop it… stop it… Tomoya-kun… Tomoya-kun… help me…" she cried helplessly, her breath hot against his lips.

He couldn't help it but to chuckle; she was still as cute as ever. He leaned closer to her ear, and whispered, "I'm right here for you." He zipped down his pants, releasing his throbbing erection. Lifting her skirt up, he pushed her panties aside and positioned himself in front of her hot, soaking core. He caught her lips and then thrust himself in, her cries muffling into his mouth.

His theory from four years ago was right; the longer he doesn't go into her, the tighter she gets. He took the time for her to get used to the pain— it must feel as painful as the first time for her, he figured.

"Mmm…!" she moaned. He released her lips to let her speak. "Love me more, love me more… Tomoya-kun…"

"Oh, so you finally know that i-it's me?" he had to adjust to her walls— it may be too much for even him. She was so tight, so _tight… _it drove him crazy— the sensation, the hotness, the sex… He started to rock his hips, and she started to moan in sync with his pace.

It didn't even occur to him that he was fucking her in the alley of a club, which reeked of garbage. It doesn't even matter if the people in the streets looked into this moaning alley… he wants her so much, nothing can distract them. He lifted one of her sweaty, slick legs, widening her hole, giving him a better angle, and she naturally wrapped it around his waist, his other hand grabbed onto her ass and forced her pelvis towards himself, making his cock slide into her even deeper. As drunk and tired Kotomi was, her arms cleverly found their way to her boyfriend's shoulders, grabbing onto him tightly, which prevented her from slipping away.

"D-did you know?" he suddenly said as he continued to bang her hard against the cement wall, "I missed you too,"

"Oh… oh…!"

"… so fucking much…" he wanted to strip her, he wanted rip away her clothing, he wanted to _see_ her.

"Tomoya— Tomoya—!" dropping the suffix, she called erotically as he rammed harder; he was close, and so was she. Both of their limits are pretty much the same as four years before: they could have sex for just as long before each other came.

He caught her lips again, exploring every corner of her. Their tongues tangling, their saliva exchanging, their voices interlocking, their kiss— so feverish, he doesn't know about her, but it certainly is driving him crazy, making him so horny, making him swell _so_ damn hard.

He increased his pace; his back aching for thrusting for so long and hard now, he couldn't imagine how painful it is for her back which has been banging against the hard cement wall for such a long while. Though, she doesn't seem like she's in pain because of the alcohol. "Unghh— aah!"

Her hold on his shoulders tightened, her walls clenched onto his rod; she came. Her hot fluids flowed down her thighs, coating his cock like lubricant, and then got the front of his pants wet. Violent chills shot down his spine as he felt it; he was at his peak too. He slammed his hips forward hard once more, her hotness grabbed onto him even harder, and he exploded into her.

_Oh the nostalgic feeling…_

The pleasure from this… compared to the mere spasms he experiences by himself when she was gone was incomparable. Everything is different with her around, nothing is the same with her around— she is everything. And he is _nothing_ without her…

Kotomi lost her strength right after he came. His fluids did not even flow out of her yet, and she collapsed into his arms. Obviously, with the amount she drank, the way she danced, how hard he fucked her… her stamina should have run out entirely. Tomoya easily caught her, but it took him a while to regain his breath. He stood there, motionless, panting, tired. He loved the feeling of her soft breasts pressing against his chest, he loved her soft breath teasing his ears, he loved the wetness that was still flowing out of her, soaking his pants.

_She's back now._

"I missed you…" he whispered, "… so, so, _so_ much." He turned to kiss her lightly on her damp cheeks, and a soft moan escaped her lips. He smiled, and held her close with one hand, while he reached for his phone with the other.

"… _hello?" HELLO!?" _his voice was blended in to the booming music.

"Damn it, Sunohara…" he said, trying his best to not sound like he just fucked somebody for an hour, "go somewhere quieter, I can't hear you,"

"_Alright, wait, wait!" _The girl was sliding down, Tomoya pushed her against the wall, trapping her with his body's weight, _"Okay, what is it?"_

"Kotomi's drunk, I'm taking her home right now." He lied, "Can you help me apologize to the girls for not greeting them?"

"_Yeah, no shit she's wasted..."_

"… how much did she drink?" he asked in a somewhat concerned voice.

"_Like twenty shots of vodka. What, didn't she puke on you yet?"_

"… Tw-twenty!? What the hell, weren't you watching her!? H-how could you let her drink that much!?" Tomoya was literally yelling at him.

"_Well, blame yourself for not coming earlier! She was all uneasy during the trip home, during the trip here, and during the time here because of you! She wanted to see you! Our presence was not needed in the first place!" _

He didn't know what to say.

"… _anyway, just take care of her, I'll bring her bag she left here tomorrow to her house."_ He hung up.

His strength slowly coming back, he pulled out of her as gently as possible, and the girl made a soft sound in her sleep. He pulled his zipper up and then carried her, bridal style, out to the street. A couple of stares surely landed upon them, but he didn't care. He was carrying the hottest chick in Roppongi, in Japan— in the whole world.

_They're all jealous of me._

He called for a cab.

_It's screaming with joy, my mind. _

He entered the car, sitting the girl in between his legs, and uttered the address of her house to the driver. The driver nodded his head suspiciously— he must have thought that this good-looking-yet-cocky-delinquent is taking advantage on the girl.

_It doesn't matter. Even if I am, she is beautiful._

The taxi started to move. The movement of the car made the girl open her eyes.

"Kotomi," he called.

The girl moaned and winced in pain, "Oh… my head…" she brought her hand up to her head, massaging her temples lightly, "Ungh… my arm… my body…"

"It's sore, isn't it?" he asked flatly.

Her body was aching, her muscles felt like they were burning— moreover, the area between her legs… it was still wet, and she could feel her panties not being in place. "W-who are you…?"

_Again._

Frustrated, he lifted her chin up, forcing her to look at him.

She blinked. Her eyes widened.

_She gasped._

"Tomoya-kun… To—"

She was interrupted by his lips. He pushed his tongue roughly into her; she returned the kiss, with life this time. He sucked on her lower lip while she sucked on his upper one. The wet, slurping sounds they made filled the taxi, it turned both of them on.

Perhaps the taxi driver, too.

"Mmm… ohh…" the girl moaned as their lips parted from each other. Their gaze locked together for a short while, Tomoya couldn't hold it and leaned back in to kiss her. The girl turned around to face him completely, kneeling down, making him sit in between her legs now. Their tongues danced and entangled, their teeth occasionally clashing, and pulling away for a millionth of a second to catch their breaths before going back to the feverish kiss.

"A-aren't you… t-tired? Hmm?" He managed to say, despite out of breath.

"Yes… I-I'm so sore, I'm s-so dizzy, my whole body h-hurts… but I want you, Tomoya-kun…" she started to rock her hips into him, feeling his hardness… but why is it damp there?

"Oh, so we're at it again?"

"… again?" she was confused.

"You're really _not_ a lightweight," he didn't answer her question. "You can definitely drink."

She blushed, "I… Tomoya-kun… I—"

"Shh, it doesn't matter." He brushed his lips against hers', his breath tickling her. "For now, just kiss me."

* * *

Yay, sequel.

Please use your imagination as to how Tomoyo suddenly joined the cast. I just thought that the group needed more people.

Why not Fuuko? Well… you know…

Why not Nagisa? Well… you know…

:D

Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It was raining, summer rain. It's hot, humid, wet… it feels so uncomfortable. The air conditioner doesn't work, and he's too lazy to call for repairs. Tomoya looked behind him at the unconscious girl. She's lying there, sleeping. She said her head was still spinning.

_No shit._

She drank so much, as told by Sunohara. Twenty shots of vodka? No normal human being can withstand that much alcohol… unless, of course, she trained.

…

Did she…?

…

… whatever.

He smiled at her sleeping face.

Suddenly, she started to moan. "Nnn…"

He hoisted himself up, and sat himself on the side of her bed. "Hey, you okay?" he asked, still smiling.

"Ungh… Tomoya-kun… my head…!" she brought her hands to her forehead, groaning in frustration.

"Don't go drinking right after a flight from now on… bet you were dying from jetlag too…"

"I was just…" he could tell that her head was hurting so much that she doesn't know what she wanted to say. She kept moving, squirming, struggling on her own bed as if she was trying to break free from something. Her hair was messy, yet still kept well in shape with her cute long pigtails tied up. A strap of her white tank top fell off her shoulder due to uneven movement; her nipples were almost visible through the near-transparent fabric, the blanket that was covering her whole body kept slipping away, down to her knees now.

"Come on," he held her down, "stay put, stop squirming. Your head's going to hurt more if you keep moving."

"I feel so sticky…"

"You didn't shower last night," He brought his fingers up to her forehead, pressing at her temples, massaging her, "Does it feel even stickier down _there_?"

She blushed at his words.

"What, don't even remember about the rough sex we had?"

She pouted.

_Oh, still so cute._

"Tomoya-kun… you—"

"— you bully." He finished the sentence for her. He smiled at her child-like face, and then got on top of her, resting his knees at the sides of her body, but not completely sitting on her. "Shall we go shower together? I haven't taken one yet, either."

She looked at him curiously, "Tomoya-kun, you were… here all night long? With me?"

He raised an eyebrow, "Well, of course. Never leave someone who's consumed a shitload of alcohol alone, right?"

Her curious eyes disappeared, "Oh… that's all…? That's why…?"

A smirk spread across his face, his hands moved down to her shoulders, massaging her stiff muscles. Same old girl; she wouldn't speak out her true thoughts. "What more do you want?"

"N-nothing…" she turned away, cheeks still flushed.

"Oh, come on, there's more than that." He released her shoulders, gliding down her body. He teased her breasts with his palms for a bit before moving lower to her abdomen, and then slipping his hands under her thin tank top. "Yes… you are quite sticky," he commented as he moved his hands back up. He could feel the thin layer of sweat on her stomach. Certainly, he did like her more when her body is smooth and clean, but this is a new feeling.

"Stop… Tomoya-kun… this is e-embarrassing… at least l-let me shower f-first…" she was stuttering.

"Desperate, aren't we?" he moved up higher, resting his hands on her breasts, "… why not 'let this hangover go away first'? Do you want me this much? Despite having such a painful headache?"

"Ohh…!" her hands found their way to his hair. It was damp with sweat— must be the humidity in the room.

He squeezed hard, moving her soft, round breasts from side to side, in a circular motion, and occasionally bringing his skilful fingers up to her perky nipples. He watched as her reactions changed from pain to pleasure, pleasure to pain, back and forth, back and forth.

"I missed these, too…" he massaged rougher, making the girl arch her back, desperate for more of his touch.

"T-Tomoya-kun… is t-that all— aah!" he squeezed her nipples so tightly, she screamed out.

Unable to hold it in anymore, he pulled her tank top off of her, leaving her in nothing but white panties. He leaned down to suck on her hard, pink flesh, biting, licking, kissing. The girl was too tired to push him away; she laid there, letting him lick her body, soak her with his saliva.

_He was touching her_.

_For so long now, she hasn't felt it._

"Tomoya-kun!" she called out as he bit onto her nipple even harder than before, "L-last night— aah!"

"Hmm?" he released her flesh for a second, "what about last night?" he cupped her other breast.

"Hnn...! L-last night…! Ahh! S-stop…!" she was moaning due to pleasure and frustration.

"You've gotten so big…" he bit onto her nipple once again, twisting and turning the other one with his fingers, "… your boobs… oh my god, I can't stop playing with them."

"Tomoya-kun, you're s-such a— hahh!" she got interrupted by his squeezing and biting actions again.

He paused and moved up to her, his face right on top of hers'. "I'm such a?"

Kotomi blushed harder. His face was so close, and with the light now, unlike last night, she could see him clearly. His cheekbones, his facial hair that isn't shaved cleanly, his enticing eyes, his… lips…

"Y-you're…" he could feel his knee rubbing against her roughly, "… you're such a pervert…"

He smirked. It was such a sexy smirk to her eyes. His hands continued to wander around her body.

"Yeah, I know," he brushed her bangs away from her eyes, "but I'm only a pervert to you," he moved his head down to kiss her lightly, "… don't you like that?"

She giggled. "But, Tomoya-kun… can we do this after I get better? My head r-really hurts…"

He pretended to be thinking, "Hmm, let's see…" he looked back down at the girl, "… no." Swiftly, he moved himself down to her lower body, spreading her legs with his strong hands.

"T-Tomoya-kun!"

"Relax…" he purred, "I'll give you a break today,"

"B-break?"

She didn't understand what he was talking about, but her head seriously hurt too much; she just couldn't bring herself up to stop him.

"Let's see, how should I do this?" clearly, he was mocking her. Lord knows that Okazaki Tomoya is a pro when it comes to fucking a girl— be it finger, tongue, or cock, he's just the master.

"Please… don't…" she couldn't help it but to sound needy in her voice. Perhaps she really does want it. No, she actually _does_.

With his teeth, he tore away the white fabric, leaving only the elastic bands wrapping around her. His eyes gleamed with joy at the sight of her hot pink flesh. It's been a while since he's seen something like this, so up close. Her fluids were streaming out of her sex, almost as if it were screaming for him to lick her, to taste her, to _enter_ her. He leaned in to blow gently at her hotness, she shook uncomfortably out of reflex, which only made Tomoya more excited. He decided to start with teasing.

"Ah! Ah ! Tomoya-kun! No…!" she cried desperately.

He ignored her and continued. Biting onto her swollen bud, he licked and kissed it, making it swell more than it already has. A huge amount of cum poured out of her, and he caught it all with his mouth, tasting the sweetness of her.

_She tastes so good._

"Hahh—! Ahh!"

His tongue moved higher, to her folds. The colour of her flesh encouraged him to bite her, _hard_. Taking the encouragement unconsciously, he bit her clit, pulling on it at the same time.

"To…" she arched her back into his touch, "Tomoya-kun…!"

Oh, her whispery voice. It was one of the key 'items' from her that turned him on, especially when she calls his name. Especially when she _moans_ it. It's music to his ears. It makes him _so_ hard. She can easily get him hard by talking, by gasping, by _breathing_. He moved his tongue back down to her soaking core. The residue of her liquids remained on her hot pink flesh, streaming out of her. Hungry for her, he licked her wetness away like a cat lapping on his milk.

"S-stop…!" she unconsciously bucked her hips into his mouth, and his tongue accidentally slipped into her slit.

He pulled out of her, "… I didn't intend to enter you today, but… if you insist…"

"Tomoya— ahh!"

Another flow of orgasm gushed out of her, the man swallowed all of it with pleasure, tasting her sweetness. Still hungry, he slipped his tongue into her slit, earning him a louder moan. She was so tight, wet, _soft_… his tongue retracted to lick her, then thrust in again to fill her. The girl could not stand it. She could not stand it but her hips were bucking into the rhythm of his tongue. Her walls contracted, Tomoya grunted and pushed his tongue deeper. Inside, he wiggled a little and earned himself more pouring liquids from her. The sticky fluids filled his mouth, and dripped out of the sides of his lips and her burning core.

"Tomoya… kun…! To—" She whimpered, her breath getting uneven and harsh, "p-please…! Tomoya-kun!" She came again, and bucked her hips forward one last time, grinding her wetness into his face. The number of orgasms drained her remaining strength and gave her a bigger headache, her hips and legs collapsed back onto the sticky, soaked, and disgusting mattress from exhaustion. The unsatisfied Tomoya cleaned the sides of his mouth with the back of his hand, licking any remaining drops of her sweetness away, tasting them, savouring them.

_And it was just his tongue…_

Tomoya leaned down to her face and lightly pecked her soft lips. He sucked on her lower lip and then released them, "Are you sure that you can't do more than this?"

She licked her lips, getting a little taste of herself, "… I already came… I-I don't even know…how many times… To- Tomoya-kun… my head really h-hurts…" she murmured.

"Hmm, really…" he kissed her again, deeper, more intensely this time.

"Mmm…" she moaned into his mouth, as if signaling to him that she can't get enough of him. The kiss was so sweet because of her liquids— she hasn't tasted herself in a while either. Four years, to be exact. She explored him, teasing his tongue and licking the corners of him. A kiss isn't that bad. At least it didn't make her head hurt as much. They continued their fiery kiss, only parting away to gasp quickly for air. They clasped one of their hands together, their fingers intertwining. Kotomi used her other hand to pull his head down, closer, so that their kiss could be deeper than it already is. Tomoya grabbed onto her breast, massaging, squeezing, and twisting her nipple.

He pulled away suddenly, "Really, really…?" he feigned a sign of sadness.

She smiled at him sweetly, "Tomoya-kun,"

He looked at her with a question mark on his face. He couldn't help it but to smile back.

"I love you,"

When she said it last night, it didn't have as much of an effect as now, because she's saying it consciously… _now_. He paused. Why all of a sudden? Is there something wrong? She said it clearly. She didn't moan or scream or grunt it out… it was clear. She said it clearly with her whispery voice. Her eyes were saying it, too.

_Those violet eyes…_

"Me too." His smile became bigger. He got off her and walked towards the messy closet, grabbing a pair of shorts and a black tank top. "I'm going to go shower." As he approached the doorway, it suddenly came to him, "You better get well by tonight. I want to do it, _properly_."

She was lost in confusion, "Properly?"

"Oh yeah, weren't you wondering about last night?"

"…"

"I had sex with you last night, at the back of the club. In the alley." He said proudly— almost _too_ proudly, it sounded blank.

Her face turned red instantly, "To-Tomoya-k-kun!"

"Don't worry, nobody saw."

"B-but…"

"I'll tell you about it later when you get better. I don't want to startle you now… with your crazy hangover." He walked out of the room.

* * *

Kotomi woke up from the heat and stumbled to the shower to wash away the stickiness. She got out of the tub and dried herself up, and realized that she forgot to get her undergarments. Annoyed, she carelessly grabbed one of Tomoya's t-shirts that was on the sink— he must've been washing it or something because it smelled so rich of soap.

The girl ventured through her house. It was surprisingly clean. Like her room, she was expecting everything to be half-assed cleaned, with probably piles of clothes or some other miscellaneous things here and there. But now, she's walking through her hallways and is finding everything… completely cleaned. Is it because he wanted to impress her? That's why he cleaned up the entire house? But that doesn't make sense— if he had the will to clean up the entire house… why didn't he clean up her room properly, as well?

She walked downstairs, and a scent of delicious cooking reached her nose. She held tightly onto the handles, being careful so that she wouldn't topple over and end up rolling down the stairs. At the bottom, she slowly walked towards the smell, but as she passed the living room that lead to the garden, she decided to go in.

Kotomi sat herself onto the white leather sofa, closing her eyes and listening to the rain that was still pouring outside. She took a deep breath—

— _she's home…_

The smell of her house put her at ease. It's been too long. Her boyfriend's scent has pretty much dominated the entire house. She can hardly smell herself, or her parents.

_Her parents_…

At the dorms in America, she can often hear her roommates talking via the phone or webcam with their parents. Sometimes, she is able to hear their parents nagging or reminding her roommates about something trivial or pointless. The roommates would repeatedly tell them that they're annoying, but Kotomi knew that she would never use that tone to talk to them.

"_You two are liars…!"_

She would never speak to her parents that way. If only she could listen to their voices again, hearing them nag her about pointless things would be fine.

"_I hate both of you!"_

… Not that she is able to speak to them anymore.

Her eyes still shut tightly, tears began to stream down her cheeks. If given another chance, she would never have said that.

"_I hate you!"_

Her breath started to get uneven, and she started to sob. "I'm so sorry…" she refused to open her eyes. It's as if something is telling her that if she opened them, she would see _them_. She would see their regret and remorse for not staying with her when she wanted them to. "… I'm sorry…" she repeated.

"Kotomi?" the voice approached her, "what's wrong?"

She continued to sob.

He sat himself down beside her, and she naturally rested her face in his neck, still refusing to open her eyes. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder, rubbing her back softly as an attempt to make her feel better. Sadly, his attempt was futile as she began to cry louder. She grabbed onto his black tank top with one hand so hard, he could feel the fabric stretching.

"Hey…" he started, "… what is it?"

He waited until her breathing and sobbing sounds died down.

"Kotomi…"

"… Tomoya-kun…" she pulled back from his neck, and looked at him with her teary eyes.

He blushed at the sight; her sad face brought her cuteness level to the maximum. "Tell me what's wrong…"

Without warning, she pushed him down suddenly, and lied on top of him. She attacked his lips, thrusting her tongue into his mouth, and much like before, she explored the corners of him and sucked on his tongue.

"H-hey…" he said as she pulled away momentarily.

Tomoya was beyond surprised; it was always he who starts up the fire and never her. It took him a while to adapt to her strength, for he never knew that she was this strong. He eventually returned the feverish kiss, sucking back onto her tongue and lower lip.

He stopped and pushed her away to ask her, "Do you want to talk to me?" He was ignored as she crashed her lips back down to his'.

"Mmm…" she jerked her lips away from his to proceed to his cheeks, and then moved lower to his ear. She started to tease him at first, licking so lightly that her tongue only barely touched his earlobes.

"Kotomi… " he groaned. Perhaps… he'll talk to her later.

He lifted the oversized t-shirt she was wearing up her back. She pulled away to allow him to take the shirt off, and he threw it behind the sofa. Tomoya pulled her back down so that he could kiss her again. The moment her soft breasts touched his hard chest Tomoya went hard, and he knew that she could feel it. She then sucked hard on his earlobe, making it bright red. Tomoya grunted her name again as his hands wandered around her back and her waist, feeling the slimness of her body. She started to rub her body against his', her breasts arousing him, getting him even harder.

"Ugh… Koto… mi…" the softness of her was so incredible— her breasts were so full and round, her nipples so erect, it was almost impossible to bear. His erection was throbbing with frustration, and he made it clear by nudging his hardness against her crotch.

The girl pulled away and smiled at him. She pecked him lightly on the lips one more time and told him to sit up. Tomoya obeyed and got up, watching the girl get down on the carpet as she spread his legs slowly. His cock was screaming for attention under his white basketball shorts. Kotomi pulled his pants down, releasing him of his pain.

"Tomoya-kun… you're so big…"

"Oh, am I?" he said proudly.

She smiled and brought her hands to his shaft. She was actually surprised. Four years ago, he wasn't _as_ big, but now…

"Ugh…" he groaned as her soft hands stroked him.

… Guess puberty for boys really does last longer than girls.

"Ko… Kotomi…" he was sweating with anticipation. Her hands were holding onto him so softly that he was getting annoyed. He wants her to stop teasing, yet her fingers continued to trace him.

"Tomoya-kun…" she paused and leaned closer to his cock, kissing the tip, and she could feel it throb in her hands. She giggled and inserted his hood into her mouth while her hands pumped his shaft lightly.

"Oh… my god…" his voice became unmanly, and it was embarrassing— at least he thinks it is.

The warmth of her mouth was obviously not as satisfying as her womanhood, but it was definitely _incredible_. Her fingers traced his veins, and it tickled him so much he was close to exploding. When she sucked lightly, he lost it. Blood rushed down his spine and into his crotch; the heat shot out of his rod and he exploded into her mouth. He thrust himself into her, and half of his hardness was forced inside her mouth. Nearly choking from his fluids and _him_, she backed away to gasp for air. His white musky liquids filled in her mouth, trails of it streamed out of the sides of her lips as she could not hold that much. She swallowed the bitterness desperately, as if she was really hungry (which she was), and cleaned the sides of her mouth with the back of her hands.

He waited until his breathing rate returned to normal. The girl kneeling in front of him had a look in her eyes— she's wants more. She wants way more than this. Tomoya sighed and pulled his shorts back up.

"T-Tomoya-kun…" she said with disappointment.

"Kotomi," he pulled her naked body back up, making her sit in his lap, "what happened?"

She ignored him again, and moved higher to attack his lips.

Tomoya grunted and pulled away, "Tell me," he looked at her sternly, "what is wrong?"

The girl sighed and shut her eyes, resting comfortably on his hard chest, "I… just… suddenly thought about my parents,"

She said it in the softest voice ever, and it was ever so cute. Tomoya knew very well that her parents died from a malfunctioning plane, but throughout their first year together, Kotomi never showed much sadness towards their death and she mentioned little about their relationship. He has always thought that she's gotten over it a long time ago.

"Did you know? The last thing I said to them was…" she swallowed, "_I hate you_,"

That definitely startled Tomoya, he was speechless for a second, and he didn't know what to say.

"I told them that I hated them." Her voice was getting shaky.

"…"

"I… I want to apologize t-to them…"

"Kotomi…"

"I'm so sorry… okaa-san, otou-san… I'm so s-sorry…" she wept, "I didn't mean it when I said that…"

He could feel his tank top getting wet from her tears. He embraced the girl tightly, stroking her back. Her body was shaking from the weeping, and she wasn't stopping.

"Hey… don't cry," he knew that he was never good at comforting, but he tried to do it anyway, "… at least, well, your parents loved each other, and loved you."

"… Tomoya-kun?" she raised her head curiously to look at him.

He smiled, "My father… you know very well, wasn't— _isn't_ really… a good person. The things he did eventually lead to my mother's death, and… I was there to witness— how she died."

Kotomi reached a hand up to cup his face, "I'm so sorry…"

"And, yeah, I cried many nights— years for it, and that man… he didn't even care. He didn't even _try_ to show that he cared."

"Tomoya-kun…"

"It doesn't really matter anymore because… well, at least, we have each other, right?"

She wiped her tears away. "Tomoya-kun, I love you."

"I love you too."

"It's strange," she smiled, "but… it's like my parents sent you here to replace them, so that you can take care of me."

"Then, I'm your guardian angel?"

"Something like that."

"… a ridiculously good looking guardian angel," he joked.

She giggled. "Tomoya-kun,"

"Hmm?"

"You're everything I have."

_His heart melted when she said that._

"So… please…"

He pushed her down slowly onto the sofa, sucking onto her vulnerable neck.

"P-please…" she arched her back, he cupped her back to hold her position, "… d-don't leave me alone…"

The couple never talked about their past back then. Their lifestyle used to be a typical husband-wife lifestyle. They get off work (school), buy groceries and do work (homework) together, cook, shower, sleep, and sometimes (always) have sex. The things they talked about used to be trivial topics such as gossips of friends or teachers— back then, both of them avoided their past. But now that they've grown up…

"Kotomi…" he whispered her name as he moved his face up to hers'. He kissed her forehead lightly and then took off his shorts once again, this time for good. He dropped them at the side of the sofa, his throbbing manhood returned to its hardness.

"Tomoya-kun… your top… your top…" she whimpered in frustration. She, too, wanted to see him.

He got the message and immediately stripped himself of his top. Kotomi blushed at the sight of his body— he was buffer than before. Though, it was not to the point where it made him look fat; he still had a somewhat skinny figure. His arms, his collar bone, his chest muscles, his ripped abs… everything was so _good_, she found herself getting wet from just looking at him. She reached up to rub his chest, her other hand grabbed onto his biceps, squeezing and feeling his stiff muscles.

"You're so wet…" he said as he positioned himself over her. Her fluids were _flooding_ out of her core. It's as if she's calling for him, telling him to enter her quickly, because she can't bear it any longer.

"Faster… Tomoya-kun…" yes, she's actually calling to him now. "I want you now…"

He entered her slowly, lovingly, yet so _painfully_. He watched as the girl opened her mouth and said something wordless and soundless. Her jaw kept hanging open, she panted heavily as he began to slowly rock his hips.

"I'm not going to leave you,"

"Ahh…! Unghh…!"

He increased the speed of his thrusts, the girl below him started to moan in pleasure. She wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing his face closer to hers'. Tomoya grabbed onto her knees and spread them wider, she quickly curled them around his waist so that he didn't have to bother holding onto her. By doing so, her walls grabbed even more tightly onto his rod. Out of ecstasy, Tomoya lost balance and fell on top of the girl; he held himself up by resting his elbows at the sides of her head.

"T-Tomoya-k-kun…!" although he told her this morning that he had sex with her last night in an alley, Kotomi still feels as if she hasn't had sex for many years. She could only remember her last experience with him on the day she was leaving for New York, in the airport, in one of the stalls of the men's washroom… He continued to ram into her, again and again, never showing any signs of fatigue. Her head still spun uncomfortably, but she wanted this more than anything. A headache won't be able to stop him or her from doing this— it's been too long.

The sounds of her moans and screams grew louder; it filled the room along with the wet slapping sounds of their bodies. Kotomi pulled the man down and their lips connected, their tongues danced in each others' mouths as they reached closer and closer to their peaks.

"E-everyday… i-in America— aah!" She suddenly started. He wanted to listen to her, but he couldn't stop himself, "By just t-thinking about y-you… Tomoya-k-kun!"

He was trying so hard to listen to her words, he knows it's important because she rarely tried to talk during sex. "T-tell me… Kotomi…" he grunted under his breath.

"J-just by thin…king about y-you… I g-get s-so, so…! Ohh…!" He was ramming into her by now, his thrusts like jackhammer blows, he couldn't even believe that she could speak this clearly. "Tomoya-kun! Tomoya-kun—!" her walls contracted, holding so tightly onto his shaft, her climax summoned his'. He shot deep into her womb as her walls held his rod with sublime accuracy; every contour in faultless alignment. It was as though they were designed to fit together.

His body collapsed onto hers'. Today's sex made yesterday's seem amateur. Yesterday felt somewhat lifeless due to the alcohol, and now that they're even more open with each other, everything feels perfect. It's as if they have broken a wall between them. Tomoya gathered his remaining strength and lifted her and himself up. He made her kneel in front of him, with him in between her legs. He pulled his member out of her, and replaced it with his fingers.

"Just by thinking about me, you get wet? Horny? What is it?" He looked up at the girl, her face flushed and sweaty.

"Both…" she avoided eye contact.

He smirked. "Same with me, I get hard… by thinking about you."

"Tomoya-k-kun…"

"I got hard, _everyday_…"

She wrapped her arms around his neck and bucked her hips forward, making his finger slide deeper into her. "H-how did you get o-over it?"

"Well, you know, guys have their ways…" he whispered, "… what about you?"

"I…"

"Don't tell me you bought dildos and all that." He said angrily.

"No! I-I wouldn't…!"

He clasped his other hand behind her to prevent her from falling back as he was thrusting faster now. Her wetness was pouring out of her, onto his palm, and dripping down onto the leather seat of the sofa.

"I know you wouldn't." he said in a straight tone, "If you did, I would know. So how did you do it?"

Her face turned redder than before. "I… just…"

"Do you want to show me?" he asked cleverly. He was creating a scissoring gesture inside her, stretching her core as more fluids flowed out and onto his palm.

"Hahh—! Tomoya-kun…!" She threw her head back as her orgasm overcame her. His fingers, tongue, and cock, can make her come at anytime, anyplace, anywhere. He's just so skilled. Her knees lost their strength as she fell onto him, her breasts against his sweaty chest, her head resting on his shoulder, breathing heavily.

He waited until her panting stopped. "Well?"

"Maybe… after we eat." She said as she pulled back, kissing him on the cheek.

* * *

This chapter looks long because of the dialogue. It's actually only ~4.7k words. Only. lol.

Wow, there's like no reviews at all -_- either CLANNAD is unpopular or Kotomoya isn't a really popular couple… but whatever. I like them :D


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind as she prepared breakfast by the stove. "You know the guys from my classes don't believe that I have a girlfriend?" He rested his chin on her shoulder, "They all think I'm gay." He whispered, almost sarcastically.

"…" she stopped spreading butter on his toast, "… what?"

"All of them brought their girlfriends to their classes at least once or twice… I think I'm the only one who did not. I told them that my girlfriend is studying in America, but they all think I hallucinate and am crazy."

She clenched her fists, "Tomoya-kun…"

"They keep telling me that it's okay if I'm gay, they'll still be my friend," he rolled his eyes, "they're such immature assholes."

She turned around, pulling his head down so that their foreheads touched. "Should I… come by… or something?"

He ignored her and continued, "I've seen all of their girlfriends; they're all just decent or average looking… nothing special." He pulled back so that he could look at her eyes clearly, "So… that's why I will never bring you to my classes."

"Tomoya—"

"They might get so jealous and start to flirt with you like crazy,"

"But… they'll think—"

"—I'm not going to allow you to come," he repeated, "… because you're so much more beautiful than their chicks that it's not even logical."

"…"

"They'll take you away from me,"

Kotomi giggled.

"So I won't allow it,"

"Well, Tomoya-kun, if they take me away from you, all you have to do is save me. Take me back," she kissed him lightly on the lips.

"You're just so much better," he kissed her repeatedly, "I rather have them call me gay…" he slipped his hand under her skirt, groping her soft ass, "… than lose you to them…"

"To… moya… kun…" she moaned softly as he started kneading her ass. Her eyelids dropped and her lips parted. He tightened his grasp around her tiny waist, bringing her closer to his heated body. The feel of her breasts pressing against his solid chest excited him. He embraced her even tighter, liking the pleasant warmth of her feminine body. His hand caressed the hair at the back of her head. The purple strands curled around his long fingers. Her mouth was delicious— it has always been delicious… her aroma was one that resembles the taste of wine, she was so _good_.

"You make me… so damn horny…"he pulled away and grunted with his husky voice, "… everything about you…"

She licked her upper lip unconsciously, the action turning Tomoya on instantly. "W-we did it for so long… yesterday… and you're going to be late…"

He looked at the digital clock on the stove, it read seven fifteen. "Ugh, shit." He cursed under his breath. He quickly grabbed the breakfast Kotomi prepared for him, "Tonight, I'll do you so hard you won't be able to move the next day." He kissed her goodbye, and left the house.

The girl was left standing there, speechless. The juices endlessly poured out of her core… she screamed at herself in her mind for reminding him about the time. Why the hell does she have to act so hesitant? She wants it as much as he does.

* * *

"Where are the rest of the guys today?" Tomoya looked around the lecture hall; it was half empty, and classes are starting in less than five minutes.

The flax-coloured hair young man finished his text before answering him, "Hm, probably chillin'."

"Why didn't you go clubbing with the girls and Sunohara on Friday? Ryou was there…"

"Ugh… we're fighting."

Tomoya shook his head and sighed. Hiiragi Kappei, a rather quiet boy whom Ryou met in med school. He recently transferred to the university Tomoya was studying in because he thought becoming a doctor is pointless— he'd much rather be something more "chillin'".

"Yeah, so I wasn't able to see your so-called "hot girlfriend"… how are you two?" he asked sarcastically. Kappei was one of the guys who did not believe that he had a girlfriend, and thought that he was gay.

"Wonderful," he said honestly, "well, at least our relationship is better than your and Ryou's."

"Man, fuck off." He continued to stare at his phone, obviously waiting for a reply from his text— Ryou, most likely.

Class started, and the guys Tomoya asked about walked in one by one. They greeted each other with a nod— and that is all. He and the guys are not particularly close. In fact, Tomoya hates them. It was given, of course, how can he not hate people who do not believe him when he talks about his _perfect _girlfriend? How can he not hate the people who joke about his sexuality? … Even so, he's very much against showing them Kotomi. The semester's over in a month— and he can finally graduate, look for a job, and support his girl with his own money. It was getting to him, the fact that he's been living in her house and using her parents' money (which was left for their daughter) for almost everything. He wants to support her.

_For so long, she's been supporting him._

The three-hour long class finally ended. Tomoya did not know how much willpower he used to prevent himself from falling asleep.

"Yo, Okazaki," one of the _dickhead_ guys called to him, "you up for a party tonight?"

He frowned. For so long, he's been to so many parties with these assholes, yet he can't name a single one of them because he always gets too drunk before he can get close with them.

"No, it's okay, my girlfr—" he coughed, "my girl _cousin_ came for a visit from Hokkaido, I have to show her around."

"It's okay if you actually have a date with your boyfriend, you know?" one of them joked. The others laughed, and Tomoya laughed along with them in the fakest way.

"Ha ha, yeah. With my boyfriend."

This is totally stupid. It's as if he's getting bullied in grade school or something. He stuffed his notes and stationery into his bag. "Hiiragi, let's get some food," he tapped him on the shoulder several times, only to be ignored by him.

"No, you go by yourself, I'm still waiting…"

He grunted and stood up, getting ready to leave the lecture hall.

"Tomoya-kun,"

His head snapped up upon hearing the whispery voice.

_Oh my god, no._

He looked at the doorway of the hall.

_No… no no no no._

"Koto…"

She walked in, wearing a maize-coloured sleeveless blouse (it was low enough to reveal a bit of her cleavage), a short white skirt that reached the middle of her thighs, and brown flip-flops.

"Tomoya-kun," she repeated, more cheerfully this time.

_Oh my god, seriously, no._

He was speechless and his body was disobeying him. He wanted to run towards her and pull her away; _the dickheads are looking at her, damn it! _He stood there, motionless, his jaw left hanging open.

She was walking up towards him, to the aisle he was sitting in.

_Go away!_

She walked passed the guys, who were staring at her every movement.

_Don't come any closer…!_

She was approaching him, smiling, so damn sweetly, closer and closer.

"Ko-Koto… Koto…" he felt as if his tongue was tied up in a knot; he can't even say her name as clearly as he does when he screws her hard.

The girl threw her arms around his neck, tiptoed, and kissed him.

He widened his eyes, shifting his gaze quickly to the guys who were still staring at the end of the row. He tried to eye Kappei for help, but the stupid kid responded by winking at him, giving up a thumb's up.

"Okazaki… who is that…?"

Tomoya pushed her away, "M-my cousin. Yeah, Hokkaido has this crazy new tradition where relatives would greet each other with… a kiss, yes, a kiss." He knew very well that it was a dumb lie.

"What kind of lame, inappropriate tradition is that!? No way in hell! Okazaki, that's your girlfriend, isn't she?" Kappei said playfully, as if mocking him.

"No—"

"Tomoya-kun… why are you calling me your cousin?" she was looking at him in the most innocent way ever— her clear violet eyes, her pouting and flushed face…

"Kotomi…" he whispered angrily.

"Wow, your _girlfriend_," one of the guys started, "really, Okazaki, you don't need to find a pretty chick from your family and have her play the role as your girlfriend. We already told you that it's okay if you're gay, we aren't homophobic or anything."

"Gay?" Kotomi started with her innocent act again, "But, I beg your pardon," _sweet, now she's speaking like an ojou-sama_, "I sleep with Tomoya-kun _every night_," she emphasized the words 'every night' by speaking them in a slightly louder voice.

Tomoya could feel as if his heart has put off some weight upon seeing the guys' reactions.

"I've never seen him get close with any boys… except for his friend Sunohara-san." She was expecting for some sort of answer, but they were all dumbfounded.

"Wow." Kappei said simply, "Just, _wow_."

"Yeah, I know, right?" Tomoya said to Kappei, "Kotomi, what are you doing here?"

"Oh," she started to search through her beige-coloured leather bag, "You forgot your bento," the girl handed it to him; it was wrapped nicely in an azure handkerchief.

"… Thanks."

Kotomi turned her head back to her boyfriend, "Sorry, Tomoya-kun… because of me, you've been made fun of for four years…" she emphasized the _four_ so that they could hear, so that they could understand that he was never lying about his girlfriend being a student who was studying abroad.

"For you," he pulled her closer to his body, "I'd do anything." He smirked, "Let's go," he grabbed his bag and her hand, passing right by the guys' faces so close, they could see Kotomi's enticing eyes and smell her sweet scent.

"Oh," she suddenly stopped, "Sorry, I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Ichinose Kotomi," she bowed politely, "pleasure to meet you," she took Tomoya's hand and waved goodbye to the guys, very much like a princess.

"… Ichinose…?" some of them started to whisper to each other about the familiar surname.

"Later, guys." He said it in the cockiest tone ever, as if mocking them. "Later, Hiiragi,"

"Goodbye," Kotomi said sweetly, smiling at the speechless men.

* * *

He dragged her to a desolated area in the university so that he could have some private time with her. In the end, he brought her to an abandoned locker room. Everything inside was either rusted or broken— even the lights created a scary atmosphere; they wouldn't stop blinking and flashing.

He forced her to sit down on the worn-out wooden bench, "I told you not to come."

"You forgot your bento," she said simply.

"That's not the reason. I know you were trying to help me… I should never have told you about the crap this morning… if I stayed silent—"

"No, you're wrong, Tomoya-kun…" she placed her index finger against his lips, silencing him.

"… What? H-how can I be…?" he was confused.

She stood up, and forced him to walk backwards, "That's not the reason…"

"Kotomi…?" he backed up until he hit the wall.

The girl grabbed his hand, moving it slowly downwards, "Tomoya-kun…" she slipped his hand under her skirt, to the part in between her legs, "I'm… still wet from this morning…"

"…" it was true; he could feel her warm liquids soaking her panties.

"Please…" still holding onto his hand, she forced him to move deeper, "… let me be selfish…"

He started to move his fingers.

"… Just this once…" she purred into his ear. Immediately, she felt his hardness growing. It was stabbing into her pelvis area. She brought her other hand towards his manhood and started stroking it, up and down. He moaned softly and plunged his fingers into her hotness through the panties. "Ahh…! Tomoya-kun…!" she arched her body, making her breasts press harder against his chest.

"How did you find your way to my classroom? It's so big here…"

"Y-your schedule is… posted on the fridge… a-along with the room… n-numbers…" the sentence was said with much difficulty, but he has to admit that she was getting better at talking during sex. He brushed his fingers over her red cheeks, and his hand slowly moved to the back of her head. He cupped it and pulled her face towards him. Tomoya captured her lips and began to kiss her roughly, pushing into her with so much force that she couldn't help it but to take a step back. Realizing that she was "running away", he backed her up against the other side of the wall this time, and they hit the lockers with a loud _thud_. He sucked on her tongue as if he were sucking on a straw, tasting her sweet saliva that resembled so much of liquor, he just couldn't stop. He pulled away suddenly, and looked at her half-opened eyes, as if waiting for her to say something.

She knew very well that he likes to look at her, for every morning he would wake up before her just so he could stare at her sweet, sleeping face. He told her that she would talk or moan in her sleep, whispering his name and licking her lips at the same time. He would watch her read at the other side of the table in the afternoon, just staring at her speedy eyes that moved like a typewriter. He would watch her eat and end up feeding her because she is just…

"So damn cute,"

The girl blushed. For the millionth time he praised her beauty, his admiration for her body is just so much that it seems creepy to strangers, but she likes his strange fetishes because it's the only way he knows how to show his love towards her.

"You're so cute, it's criminal."

She looked away. The way he purred was so sexy, it turned her on so much that she did not want to keep eye contact. She felt that otherwise she would lose herself completely. "Why… why are you suddenly…?"

He slipped his hands underneath her blouse from behind and unclipped her bra, she gasped and he smirked. The loose undergarment was left dangling inside of her shirt, making it seem as if her breasts were larger than they already are. Tomoya groped her ass with one hand, and started to rub her breast through the blouse. He watched as she closed her eyes and parted her lips to let out a soft moan. "Why so suddenly what?" he repeated her question, "what are you talking about, I do this all the time."

"N-no… not this…" her hands were searching for something to grab onto. The incredible pleasure he gave her just by groping and massaging… "I meant…"

"But don't you like it when I call you pretty? I thought all girls love that," he moved his face down to suck on her white neck; the marks he left yesterday were still faintly there.

She clenched her teeth together.

"Don't worry, you can scream as loud as you like…" he released her breast and moved down to take the blouse off with one hand, the bra also coming off along with it, "nobody's going to know because this is a fairly secluded area…"

Again with the purring, she can't control herself much longer. The juices between her legs were already streaming down, and she can picture a puddle below her. "But… you only have an hour and thirty minutes left…"

He frowned and glanced at his watch. Indeed, he doesn't have much time left because they usually last pretty long before climax. "Hmm, guess we'll have to make this fast…"

Kotomi couldn't help herself but to smile; her boyfriend's face was painted with the word "trouble" on it, and it was only sex… "How do we do that?"

"Well, it's quite simple, really," he lifted up her skirt and positioned his throbbing manhood at her soaking womanhood, "notice how we always do tongue and blow jobs before we get into the real thing? We'll just skip them for now and jump into the main event." He entered her swiftly, her wetness making it easier for him to move faster.

Her moans echoed in the old, stuffy room. It was so hot without proper air ventilation in there, and plus, the weather did not tolerate them. It was the end of May, and unlike New York, the Japanese summer is not as breezy as it is over there— especially in the town they lived in.

_The town… the town where she was born, the town where she met him, the town where—_

"To… Tomoya… kun…!" she clutched harder onto his clothes, almost ripping them.

He increased his speed. She's welcoming him, encouraging him, _seducing_ him. But then…

"Ahh!"

What is this uneasy feeling? "Koto… mi…" he grunted.

"No…! No… no…!" she moaned erotically. The more she resisted, the hornier he became. Her walls are ever so tight. It's as if she never fails to pleasure him, she is such a machine… she is such a brilliant… _sex machine_… Her nails dug deep into his shoulders; by now, she could have given him an equal number of scars and marks compared to the times he kissed her.

_No what?_

He grabbed onto her pelvis, slowly sliding behind her to grope her asscheeks. He took the opportunity to squeeze them for a bit, and then he pushed her towards himself; his cock going far beyond it ever has in the process.

"D-don't …!"

_Don't what?_

She was screaming by now, desperate for support because she was sliding down the rusty locker she was leaning on; her sweat on her back made the metal slippery and such. Tomoya noticed this, and pinned his body closer to hers', crushing her tiny frame. He continued to rock his hips like an animal, like he isn't running out of stamina, he rocked even harder.

"Tomoya-kun…!"

_What is it!?_

Her mouth left hanging open, he wanted to hear her out. What does she want to say? Yet he cannot stop himself. Sex is a drug, sex is addictive, you can't stop sex once you're into it. Soon enough, she let out one last scream as her walls contracted, gripping tightly onto his shaft, and he shot deep into her womb.

Both dead tired, they slowly got down onto the dusty floor. The girl rested her back in his chest, and he naturally welcomed her, spreading his arms and then closing them to embrace the girl. He watched as her chest rise and drop quickly, then the speed gradually got slower. Bored, he reached down between her legs, rubbing the still-wet womanhood, and she whimpered gently.

"What did you want to tell me?"

Nothing came out of her mouth.

"Hey…"

"Tomoya-kun,"

The tone of her voice was serious and stern, "What is it?"

"I just… the talk you had with me this morning, regarding the girlfriends of your friends," she swallowed, "I…"

"What…" the conversation was getting weird…

"Tomoya-kun," her voice softened, "… p-please don't talk about other girls anymore…"

He blinked. What is this? What's going on?

"But… but I already told you that you're way prettier than any other girls—"

"Just…" she interrupted him, "… please don't… I feel all funny inside when you talk about other women. It's like… it's like my heart's being torn apart… ahh—! Tomo… ya… kun…!"

"Silly girl," he smirked as he fondled with her breasts, massaging and pinching her nipples, "So you get this _funny _feeling, hmm?" he bit onto her ear, sucking it gently.

"Please… just don't talk about… t-them anymore… aah!"

His girlfriend is just too cute. She gets jealous over the smallest things, and it's funny because she doesn't realize it. It's like she doesn't even know what jealousy is.

"Alright," he made her face him, and kissed her briefly, "I won't talk about woman in general when I'm with you, okay?"

"… You can't even look at them…" she looked away, her face as red as a tomato, "… or I will be mad,"

Tomoya burst into laughter, "Oh, you… y-you're such a… oh man…" he couldn't stop laughing.

"Stop it!" the girl started hammering onto his chest with her fists, again and again, like a child.

"Alright, alright!" he grabbed onto her wrists, and leaned close to her face, looking straight into her eyes, "What about your friends though? Like the twins and them…"

Kotomi looked away again, "… You can talk about Kyou-chan, Ryou-chan, and Tomoyo-chan… because they are our friends…"

He grabbed onto her chin, turning her head toward himself, and captured her lips. He drove his tongue as deep as possible into her mouth, entangling her tongue with it. She moaned into his mouth as she sucked onto his tongue. Her hands roamed freely around his body, up his neck, and then to the scalp of his head; she pulled his head closer to herself, making him kiss deeper than he already is.

"Mmm…"

Then, he released her, just to look at her pretty face again. The half-opened eyes, the flushed face, the wet lips… she is such a seductress; he couldn't bear to not pay attention to her for only one second.

"Kotomi, there really is no need for you to worry," his moved his fingers up to her cheeks, and started making funny faces by pinching the sides of her soft skin, as if playing with a child's face, "you're the only girl I need to look at; other women don't mean a thing to me."

She brushed his fingers off her cheeks. Red marks remained on her soft skin, making it look like she was blushing… but the truth is, she actually is. "Tomoya-kun, you're always so good with the flattering…"

"Hey, I'm being serious!"

The girl giggled, "I know, I know… that's what makes you so charming…" she pushed him down, his head landing lightly onto the dirty floor. She attacked his neck, signifying her horny desires.

He responded by caressing her back, "I think it's almost time for my next class…"

"Tomoya-kun, just skip it…" she said desperately while stroking his manhood, urging him for a second round.

"Hmm…" he pretended to think, "Well, are you giving me permission to do so? Because you're the reason why I'm still in school…"

She moved up to his face, "Yes, I am giving you permission," she said, "but I am going to give you extra lessons since you are skipping, _tonight_,"

"Just stop it with the cock teasing and let's have sex already," he groaned impatiently.

Kotomi smiled, so damn sweetly.

* * *

"I swear to god, everybody in the school was able to hear you,"

She giggled, weakly, of course. He ended up skipping all of his classes for the day, just so he could be with her.

"Sorry I nearly killed you," draining all of her strength, she no longer had the will to walk back home, so he offered to piggyback her. "But still, having such big boobs, you are very, very light…" he said that upon thinking about her soft breasts that were pressed against his back, "if I never had a look at your naked body, I would think that you were anorexic by just carrying you…"

Kotomi wanted to answer, but she was honestly too tired; she remained silent, her head resting at the back of his shoulder as her boyfriend walked at a slow pace. From the bus station to her house, the couple had to walk through a residential area, which of course, does not look as fancy and rich as her own area. The streets were dark and gloomy; streetlights are only visible every fifty meters, making the roads seem extra long and endless. The houses surrounding them were also dim and unlit. Everything seemed like a dead city.

"I hate this place," he suddenly said, which startled the girl. She opened her eyes and listened, "everyday, I walk pass this place, it pisses me off so much…"

"Tomoya-kun…?" she whispered. It didn't really occur to her what he was thinking, but it was definitely unusual; she lifted her head from his shoulder and kissed his cheek, "… what is it…?"

"…"

She did not like the quiet atmosphere. There really was nothing she could say, nor did she want to ask. This place is perhaps where his mother died… thoughts like that were gathering up in her mind. She had to change the subject, fast. "Tomoya-kun!" she said happily, pointing at a nearby house, which was surprisingly lit, unlike the other houses surrounding it, "Are you hungry? It looks like there's a bakery store over there,"

"… Kotomi—"

"I'm not going to cook tonight, and I don't think you are, either, so let's buy something from there!"

"But—"

"Come on…" she said to him.

He sighed. Furukawa Bakery Store, the place they are going to enter. Tomoya was hesitant for a moment. He stood in front of the glass door, still carrying the girl.

It's weird that he's not moving at all, more so standing on the ground for so long. Kotomi started to wonder if there was a bomb inside or something. She looked into the house—it was empty. Nobody was at the cash register. Is the bread in there poisonous or something? She looked at the bakery in the trays. No, nothing really was wrong with them… except for the fact that they are named very strangely… "Tomoya-kun, what's wrong?"

"It's… nothing." He pulled open the door, the chimes hanging on the top of it jingled, and he stepped in, still carrying the girl. "There's nobody here, I don't think they're even opened—"

"Tomoya-kun, look!" she pointed at a suspicious looking bread… it wasn't the typical bread-brown colour… it had a weird… blue-ish… green? He instantly had a gag reflex, making the girl laugh at him. She leaned closer to his ear, "Tomoya-kun, I think I know why you didn't feel like entering this place… you must've known that the bread here is weird… let's go."

"Yeah," he gave a blunt reply, and turned around quickly so he could get out of this place.

"Welcome to Furukawa Bakery!" a cute voice called from the hallways, "sorry nobody's here to greet you… but we were back there tidying—" the girl with bright, copper short hair appeared, and she cut herself off upon seeing her customers. She stood there, motionless, staring straight ahead at the couple. "Oka… Okaz—"

"Kotomi, let's go." Ignoring the stuttering girl, he walked out of the store, his footsteps loud, his pace fast, it seemed like he was escaping, running away from her.

"Tomoya-kun… why are you—?"

"Kotomi," again with the bluntness, "I want to have sex with you,"

She blushed, her heartbeat increased.

"I want to do it so badly,"

"…"

"With you, now."

"… L-let's go home first then…"

What is this weird feeling? His uneasiness makes her feel sick. It makes her heart clench, it makes her tear… it feels even worse than the times when he talks about other girls…

* * *

Sorry for the long delay, but I was studying hard for finals…  
Now that break is finally here, you can expect a new chapter within 2 weeks! :D


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 

"Ahh! … aaah! To… Tomoya— aah! Tomoya-kun…! N-no…!"

They've been at it for hours and hours. It's three in the morning and they're still at it. She's in the middle of the hallway with him, getting fucked so hard, screaming so loudly, yet he refused to show mercy. Right after they got home, he stripped her of the raggedy clothing, ripping her undergarments apart and started to fuck her. He started to rape her.

Again and again, she cried to him, begged him to stop. Yes, she enjoys doing it with him, but not like this…

"Stop…! No… not like t-this…! Ohh—!"

_Not like this._

"Please—!" Tears were streaming down her cheeks. He hasn't been this aggressive for so long. It's like he's out of control; he's driving into her with so much force she feels like she's bleeding. She can't get any pleasure at all from this, "… Tomoya-kun! Tomoya-kun…! Don't…!" Her arms were entirely pinned down by his. The house was pitch black since they didn't even turn on the lights. She can't see him, but occasionally she would open her eyes… just for a brief moment to look at him. His silhouette was disgusting… it was frightening… it _wasn't _him_._

_Not like this._

What's wrong with him? Right after they entered the bakery store… no, even before they entered the bakery story, when they were on that road… he began to act weird. She jerked her head up to look at him, forcing her eyes open, ignoring the pain below. She could see him, but it wasn't _him_.

"It hurts! Tomoya… kun! Aah! Aaah!" she begged for release, she begged him. Her precious Tomoya-kun… her precious Okazaki Tomoya-kun… what has become of him? Never has he done this to her. Whenever she asked him to stop, he would. He has always thought of her first. She is always his top priority. But here he is, fucking her non-stop like a wild animal, as if he's gone berserk. "It hurts! It hurts! It hurts!" Waves and waves of pain washed over her body. It was so hot down there, it hurt so much down there, "Tomoya-kun…!"

He didn't even kiss her. He just pushed her down roughly onto the floor after she took off her flip-flops and he pinned her down. He stripped and ripped her clothing. He didn't even strip himself. He just penetrated her without showing any signs of love and affection. She has no more strength. It just hurts too much. The speed he was ramming her at, the brute strength he was using on her tiny wrists… it was inhumane. It was almost like—

"Tomoya-kun! Tomoya-kun…! W-where… where did you g-go…?" Her voice cracking, her body breaking, her consciousness dying, she's giving up. "Why… why are you… d-doing th—this…!"

He came, again, exploding into her. She came as well, for the eightieth time that night, perhaps. Cum, liquids, semen… blood dripped, flowed out of her core. The man collapsed on her body, his weight killing her.

"Kotomi…"

Finally, he called her name. It was a single hint of concern from him.

Tears continued to flow down her cheeks, she couldn't stop them. "Tomoya-kun…! Why… why… !?"

He hesitated for a moment, "I…"

"Why won't you just talk to me!? Just talk to me…!"

The man released her wrists and grabbed onto her face. She fought back by squirming, shaking, hoping he would let go of her, but it was no use; he continued to kiss her, he continued to violate her petite body. He pulled back, "Kotomi…! I just…!"

"Let go of me," she said weakly, "… please, let go…!" Her hands free, she shoved him off, but her legs were too weak. She couldn't even get up and walk away.

"Kotomi!" He grabbed onto her hand, pulling her back towards himself, embracing the girl. "Stay here." It was an order.

"Just… just let go of me…!" Her tears flowed out faster, and her sobs became louder.

"I want you. I love you,"

She doesn't know why he's saying this now, out of all times. "Tomoya-kun, don't you understand!? What you just did, just now... it was everything _but _love!"

His grasp tightened on her hand.

"Y-you were exactly… exactly like him…" She whimpered, "… like that man... who raped me when I was seven. Tomoya-kun, you were there too,"

"Kotomi…" He forced her chin up, making her look at him straight in the eye, but she avoided eye contact; she doesn't want to look at this monster. He narrowed his eyebrows and leaned down to capture her lips. The girl was too weak and tired to pull away; she just stayed there, motionless, allowing him to violate her. "I want you," He said suddenly again.

"…"

"I want _only_ you."

She jerked her lips away from his', "Tomoya-kun… if it's my body, my heart… you have them all. You have _all_ of me already. I don't know why you're suddenly so possessive... please… is there something wrong? Talk to me if you have any trouble, don't hide it…"

He ignored her and carried her up to her room, and lied her gently down onto the soft bed. Then, he got on top of her, and started to suck on her neck, shoulders, arms… every inch of her body. Juices were still pouring out of her, he felt. He brought a hand down there and started to rub her clit.

"Please… stop…! I d-don't…!" she moaned.

He continued to touch her swollen bud, pinching, rubbing, teasing it while he sucked on her nipples. The girl was completely trapped down by him; she has nowhere to run.

"Tomoya-kun…! I-I don't want this…! S-stop… ahh!"

He paused, "How can you not want this?" his tone was serious and agitated, "I'm simply showing how much I love you,"

She knows. She knows it's his way of showing love, but what he's showing her right now… _isn't love_. It's merely anger and madness. "I can't feel you at all, Tomoya-kun."

The man stopped his actions. Her simple comment struck him like thunder, it made his heart stop. "Kotomi…"

The girl looked up at him, stroking his cheek gently with her soft hands; she wanted a better look and feel of him… why did he become so rough all of a sudden?

"You… can't feel me…?" He asked in confusion.

"You're different," she said, "please get off me."

He didn't move. He refused to move. "No."

"Tomoya-kun… please get off… I don't want this anymore…"

"No," he said again.

"For the past few hours," she suddenly started, "all you've been showing me was anger. It's different from the other times—when you actually showed me love. I don't understand you anymore. I don't understand _you_, Tomoya-kun."

"…"

"So please… tell me what's wrong. Otherwise, get off me."

The look on his face darkened. He moved his hands slowly to his belt, taking it out of his black shorts. Then, he looked at the girl, stunning her with his brilliant eyes. She gasped, but before she could react, he pulled her up, his face close to hers, their lips touching lightly. "Very well," he sucked on her lower lip, tilting his head to the side so he could get more of her.

"No…" she moaned as he released her briefly to breathe. Catching her off-guard, his hands moved swiftly to tie her hands together at her back with his belt. He smirked, and she squealed. "Ahh!" He tightened his belt. The girl was in so much pain, she could only find a comfortable position by resting her head on his shoulder, "… Tomoya-kun…! Please don't… Not like this…" she begged him. He moved to sit at the side of the bed, and positioned himself in front of her bloody core. He must've somehow cut her inside, physically and mentally, that's why she's still bleeding.

Tomoya thrust upwards, she made a painful sound but he ignored her. She screamed for him to stop; he knew she was in pain, he knew it hurt a lot…

_It hurt to see her in pain—_

But he can't stop himself. Why can't he stop? He can't stop thinking about her—he can't stop thinking about _her_. He needs to relieve this stress, this discomfort, this… _anxiety._

_She is dying..._

"Stop stop stop stop stop stop—"

_She is pleading…_

"It hurts hurts hurts hurts hurts hurts hurts hurts—"

_He is in __**fear**_.

"Tomoya Tomoya Tomoya Tomoya Tomoya Tomoya Tomoya—"

_She will leave him._

The girl stopped screaming, she stopped moving, she stopped…

He pulled her away to look at her.

_She was disgusting. _

Her face was pale.

_She was broken. _

Her eyes were red, her tear ducts were out of control.

_She wasn't the same._

Her mouth half-opened, saliva dripping out of the side of her lips, and her chest was rising and dropping rapidly.

_She wasn't his pretty angel anymore._

"Kotomi…"

_And it's because of him._

_

* * *

  
_

Her body was still hurting. She hurt all over, the stench of her blood and their mixed liquids filled the room—that's why she woke up. Her eyes were puffy and stinging from all the crying, but she forced them open, only to find his face right in front of her. She gasped, he was fast asleep, he was so close, and her heart couldn't stop pounding. She struggled to get off the bed, to get away from him, but she realized that her arms were still tied up behind her. Her legs were weak, her body ached and she couldn't move her head because her neck was in so much pain. Yet she continued to squirm out of his grasp. He was a light sleeper, so she tried to be as quiet as possible, but she couldn't help it but to wince whenever she moved; it hurt too much.

"Stop moving," his eyes were opened, her heart almost stopped when her eyes met his'. Out of panic, she fell off the bed and hit the ground. Her initial thoughts were to run. She forced herself up, but her legs were numb, she immediately lost balance, and fell straight forward.

He caught her from behind, embracing her, holding her tightly.

"… I don't want this anymore, I don't want this anymore…!" She whispered, her eyes getting teary again, "Let go… let go… please…"

He refused to let go.

"Tomoya-kun… just a little while ago, we were getting along fine, I don't understand—I don't understand at all…"

He released the belt, her arms hung lifelessly, and he turned her around.

"Tomoya-kun—"

"Are you afraid of me?" He backed her up slowly against the opposite side, she hit the wall and he moved his body close to hers'.

"I…" Yes. She was scared of him, without a doubt. Because he can suddenly transform into another person—he can transform into a heartless, mind and body-fucking animal.

"Do you love me?" He brushed his lips against hers', "Do you?"

"Tomoya-kun…" _Isn't it obvious!?_

"It doesn't matter," He gave her a hug; he gave her a warm, humane hug, "Just know that you're the only one I love, so don't be angry at me… no matter what I do…"

"I still don't understand,"

"Shh…" He sucked her white neck, a moan escaped her lips, "I'm so sorry… but I needed you, I love _only_ you."

It doesn't matter anymore. It doesn't matter that he nearly killed her anymore—the Tomoya-kun she wanted, the Tomoya-kun she knows is back. So as long as he does not go out of control again, it doesn't matter. She had no strength, but her arms unconsciously wrapped themselves around him, signifying her forgiveness. "Tomoya-kun…"

"You… I need you…" he's been repeating the same lines over and over again, as if reassuring her. But what is there to be reassured about? He loves her, she loves him, and there is no other outcome. He is definitely acting strange. "I won't leave you, so you… don't leave me."

Did the thought of her leaving him suddenly pop out in his mind? Was the reason why he raped her acted out of impulse? Is he honestly this protective? "U-unless you've done something unforgivable, I won't."

He gave her a weak smile. His hand slowly moved down to her womanhood, rubbing her folds gently.

"Ahh! Don't—!" she squealed as he pushed a finger into her slit.

"Oh?" he moved his finger around, as if searching for something. Indeed, he found some sort of weird bump inside of her. He rubbed against it, and the girl squealed louder, "I'm so sorry… I must've hurt you really badly…"

"Unghh…! Don't… aah…!" It's even harder to talk when pain and pleasure are mixed together. Tomoya pulled out of her slowly, and looked at his finger. A bit of blood that was mixed with her wetness could be seen.

"We should go to the hospital." He said without hesitation.

She gasped, "W-what? No! Please don't take me there… Tomoya-kun,"

"Bleeding internally is a serious problem—"

"Don't take me back there!" She yelled, "I don't want to go back there!"

"Go… back?" Yes, he remembered. She had to stay in a hospital for over three months before release because of that terrible incident… is that also the reason why he can't be extra rough on her? Is that why she bleeds so easily?

"I don't want to…!"

"Kotomi…" but her life could be at stake…

"Tomoya-kun!" She continued to beg.

He looked at his finger, the residue still lingering there.

"Please…"

He hesitated for a moment. "Fine…" he lifted her weak body up, and walked over to the bed, placing her gently on it, "we… we'll just not have sex for a while, and you have to listen to everything I say. Do you understand?"

She smiled—it's like he hasn't seen one for a while even though she just showed him one yesterday, "Yes, I do."

"Good," He gave a sigh of relief, "Stay at home, and don't go anywhere. But… you're too weak to go anywhere anyway."

"Is that all?"

"Yes."

She nodded and closed her eyes. "Tomoya-kun, go to school. If you start moving now, you can still make it for your last two classes."

He turned around to look at the clock. "Oh shit," he stood up, grabbed his clothes and put them on clumsily. "Man, I didn't even shower…" he said as he raised an arm to sniff himself, "whatever, I'll do it tonight… and you, Kotomi, remember not to move around…"

"Yes, yes, okay, just go," she smiled, waving him goodbye.

He walked quickly over to her, leaned down and kissed her lightly on the lips, "Love you, bye."

"Take care…" Kotomi watched as he left the room. She could hear him walking down the stairs, and the sound of the front door closing loudly. Certain that he's left the house, she sat up, even though it still ached all over. She looked down at her wrists, they were bruised and red. "Sorry, Tomoya-kun…" The girl started to rub the redness gently, "… but…"

* * *

_She's not stupid. _

Ichinose Kotomi isn't stupid. Judging from his actions from last night—this morning, something is definitely wrong with her boyfriend, and it was all because of the route they took last night. Was it the road? Did it remind him of some traumatic memories? Was it the bakery store? Did Tomoya become so lazy for the last four years that he bought all of his meals everyday there, and seeing that stuff again made him feel sick?

… Or is it because of… the girl?

Something invisible stabbed her in the heart. She felt like she was bleeding.

_Intensely._

It feels so bad, even worse than the pain she received last night. What is this? It makes no sense. What is this!?

"Tomoya-kun…" She unconsciously said out loud. She was on the streets, walking weakly back to the route they took last night. But now… now she suddenly had the urge to kneel down and cry. Cry and cry and cry until somebody—until _he_ comes and tell her how much he loves her, even though she already knows how much.

_Does she?_

"Do I…?" She said again. Coming out to find out for herself was a hard thing to decide; she was hesitant from even getting out of the house. Now, she's standing in the middle of the street, the afternoon sun blazing above her head. She watched as her shadow below mocked her, and listened as the cicadas cry their signature annoying sounds. Then, she turned back. She turned around, head down, changing her mind. Her mind screamed for her to continue on, telling her not to go to that… bakery store, telling her not to find out about the truth.

_It's for the better._

She let out a long sigh and walked faster, her head still down. Her body was still hurting, but at least the pain was slowly fading, but the pain in her _heart_ kept on building. The wound got bigger and bigger as she walked faster—she could feel it. It's the feeling of a sharp knife; it's slicing from the centre of her heart, to the sides, to her arteries, to her lungs.

_And she can't breathe—_

Kotomi grasped onto her chest, squeezing and pulling onto the skin there, so hard. Her legs lost balance and she fell onto the hard cement. She supported her upper body with an arm, forcing herself with her weak strength up. She does not want anybody to see her like this, though luckily, nobody is on the streets. She clenched her fists. The movement of her fingers scratched against the rough cement, wounding the tips of her skin. "I… have to go back," The sudden change of thought came out of nowhere, and she dragged herself up, turned around and walked towards the bakery store that is barely visible in the heat. Tired as she already is, the highway mirage made her feel dizzier. Her head was spinning so hard she feels like coughing up blood.

* * *

"E-excuse me…?" the girl called into the store. It was empty, much like yesterday, except the door is left open and the air conditioner isn't on. "Hello?" She called again.

A distant voice can be heard—it's the same voice as yesterday, "Coming!"

Kotomi stood up properly, and fixed her dress and hair from the fall earlier.

"Welcome to Furukawa Bakery!" It's that voice again.

She could feel herself shiver; _that high pitched and cute voice has the capability to take her boyfriend away!_ The same girl from yesterday ran out of the hallway, dressed in the same clothes, and the same bright copper hair… with two strands of ahoge sticking out like antennas—

"Hello, may I… help you?" The shopkeeper felt uneasy from the girl who was staring at her for so long. But she certainly looks familiar…

"Uh… I…" She tightened her grasp on her handbag, twisting the handle like she was drying a towel, "I…"

"Do you… want to try our new product? Okaa-san made it, and she seems pretty proud of it. Otou-san says he loves it, but…"

This shopkeeper is a nice girl. At least she can converse with strangers easily… is this one of the reasons why Kotomi is feeling more and more uneasy and insecure? "Excuse me…" She finally spoke out.

"Yes?" She smiled so politely… It makes her wonder, if Kotomi were a boy, perhaps—

"By any chance, do you know Okazaki Tomoya?" She paused, realizing what she just said. "… I'm… I'm sorry," Her courage just instantly poured out of her mouth. She didn't even think before she spoke. "Pardon my rudeness, I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Ichinose Kotomi, pleasure to meet you." She bowed politely.

The shopkeeper first appeared surprised, and then her face softened, "N-nice to meet you, I'm Furukawa Nagisa, the daughter of the owners to this store…" She bowed back.

Then, a moment of silence.

"Um…" the girls stood uncomfortably. It's just so damn awkward. "So… uh…"

"Oh!" Nagisa suddenly blurted out, "I remember you!"

Kotomi gasped. She was like a witness of a murder case pointing to her, the culprit.

"You're… you were the girl from yesterday, on Okazaki-san's back! He was carrying you!" The look on her face was neither happiness nor sadness. It was more like a troubled face, and Kotomi can already guess what's happening.

"So you do know of Okazaki Tomoya?" She repeated the question from before.

"Y-yes… we… met—"

"How?"

"It… it actually isn't anything big…" She cleared her throat, "We're just normal friends, and—"

"Please, I am not accusing you of anything, so speak at ease,"

The look on the famous Ichinose's face was incredibly intimidating. Nagisa wondered to herself, how can a pretty angel like her have such a serious face? It's as if… if she said anything wrong, she would take a knife out of her handbag and stab her to death, and then she would lick the tips of the metal, savouring the blood that tastes so much of iron and metal. "We… uh… we met…" She continued; her hands fiddled with her apron, her toes curling up in her sandals, and her eyes looking elsewhere, "We m-met… at school, you know, the university he studies at. We have a class together…"

"Oh?" Kotomi tilted her head, as if surprised, "Really, what class?"

"I-it's only… Japanese History—"

"I beg your pardon," Her tone is still calm and collected, "But he does not take such a course, he is, after all, in the faculty of engineering and technology…"

"Yes, um, I must've mistaken…! Oh, sorry, I've been so busy lately, my parents aren't here, so I'm managing the shop all on my own, and uh…"

"Furukawa-san…" Kotomi rested a hand on her shoulder, "… exactly, what happened?"

* * *

_Not having sex for a while_. Exactly how long!? Maybe it's best to take her to the hospital.

For the whole day, he was worrying about that. After he got off the bus, he was pretty much sprinting his way home, just so he could tell her what's best to do. He reached the front door, and grabbed the keys out of his pocket. His hands shaking with nervousness, he opened the door with much difficulty.

"Kotomi—" He paused. The girl was sitting on the step, with her sandals still on. Curious, he began to ask, "Hey… did you go out today? Why are you all dressed up…? I thought I told you to stay home…" He walked towards the girl, crouching down so that he could see her face. Her hair covered her eyes, but he could tell that she looked… so, very tired…

She remained silent.

"Is something wrong?"

The girl slowly wrapped her arms around his neck, gently pulling him down. He lost balance and fell to his knees, his hands supported his weight by resting onto the step Kotomi is sitting on. "Tomoya-kun,"

"…"

"You make me listen to you," She stroked the back of his head lightly, "You make me promise you things,"

"…"

"… I know I never told you, nor did I mention this to you, but…" She pulled back, "… does that naturally mean that you can cheat on me?"

He widened his eyes, his mouth hung open. He was speechless.

"You slept with another woman."

"Koto…"

"More specifically, you slept with that girl from the bakery store. Am I correct?"

"I…" Ichinose Kotomi. The genius girl who studies so much that she excels in every area of subject. Her grades are so extraordinary that she is given permission to study by herself in the library during high school. Her grades are so incredible that she has won the scholarship to study abroad. Ichinose Kotomi, the genius girl who has read so many books, is able to identify what type of tone she should use to speak to specific people.

"Tomoya-kun," She didn't give him a chance to think of what to say, "You cheated on me, and that's a fact."

"I didn't—"

"The whole reason for raping me last night… was because you cannot handle it if I found out. That is absurd. You are absurd. I found out now, what are you going to do?"

His heart is pounding like crazy. He could feel blood circulating through his body in a speed so damn fast, he feels like throwing up. His breath was getting heavier… was his cute little girlfriend ever this… manipulative?

"I won't forgive you if you have done something unforgivable."

He raised his head; she told him this in the morning. It's been echoing in his head for the whole day, and now that she repeated it, it's resonating in his ears, he's going to go insane soon. However, he decided to keep his cool. "Then, let go of me." He said calmly.

Her body stiffened, but she didn't let go. Instead, her grip around his neck tightened, pulling him closer towards herself. Tomoya reacted by hugging her back, and burying his face in her shoulder. "Tomoya-kun…"

"Let go of me… I cheated on you," He breathed into her shoulder deeply, enjoying her softness, "I've done something unforgivable."

Kotomi leaned the side of her head on his', closing her eyes, "I want to…"

"…?"

"Earlier, I went to see Furukawa-san. I asked her what happened,"

"Kotomi…"

"After she told me, I don't know if I was… angry or… I just didn't know what I was feeling. When she was telling me, I wanted to call you right away, and yell at you… tell you—tell you that I want to break up with you, tell you that I don't love you…" She swallowed hard, "but then, Furukawa-san told me that… you weren't actually…"

"I was drunk." He said simply.

"And that you were…"

"Calling _your_ name when… I—" He helped her finished her sentence again.

"She told me that—"

"—I missed you that much. That's why I did it… I didn't mean to—I… I had nowhere else to go, so I tagged along with the guys and we drank… we drank and drank… and then—" He pulled back and rested his forehead on hers', "I've done wrong, I admit… so please, forgive me…"

It's almost as if he's swearing an oath to a goddess; it's almost like they're in some kind of forbidden love. The girl left one arm around his neck, the other one slid down, and she reached for his cheek, her fingers that were dried with blood from earlier running smoothly down his skin. "I'm not going to—"

"Why!?" He pushed her down, her head hitting the hardwood floor loudly. She winced in pain and then looked at the man with a frightened face—much like last night. "I just…! I wanted you _that_ much! I missed you _that _much! Don't you understand!?"

"Tomoya-kun… don't do this…" The pain was returning.

"You were gone for so long… h-how the hell do I…?" He clenched his fist, and gritted his teeth. Then, he looked at her eyes… her eyes that pitied him. A pitying look. "You can't leave me. I won't allow it." He ripped the tanktop she was wearing off, revealing her light pink bra. He pulled the lingerie down, and her breasts bounced for attention. He grabbed one with his large hand and squeezed hard. The girl squealed but she did not squirm, nor did she move. She's not even reacting to his violent actions. Realizing this, he got even more pissed off. He attacked her lips, bruising the redness, but again, she did not react. He thrust his tongue into her mouth, hoping that she would kiss him back, but she remained lying there, motionless.

She closed her eyes, and let him do as he pleases.

"Damn it… fight back!" He suddenly yelled.

That startled her.

"Why won't you fight back…?" The frustration in him is showing all over his face.

She reached up to stroke his cheek once again, the action soothing him, "I'm so sorry… Tomoya-kun…"

He blinked, "Why are you apologizing…?"

"I understand—the reason you're like this…" Kotomi sat up and embraced him, "… It's all because of me."

_That's right._

"You simply…"

_Love me too much._

"Kotomi—"

* * *

First off, I have to apologize for breaking my promise of updating within two weeks. Here's my excuse: during break, I was either up on the mountain snowboarding or down here shopping/sleeping. Then, before I knew it, school's back again (boo).

Secondly, I know that most of you do no like rape scenes, but believe it or not, THEY ARE THE EASIEST TO WRITE. Seriously, the second half of this chapter was almost impossible to write because I couldn't balance the cheese and romance and crap… and all that equally. So yeah, sorry for the crappy chapter.

Third, THANK YOU SO MUCH for all the reviews so far!! I think I should erase that A/N at the end of chapter 2 now… hehe. Anyway, be it good or bad, reviews from you are the best source of encouragement and drive for writers to continue their stories! So keep them coming!

See you soon ;D


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

After the two-hour long ceremony, the graduates roamed freely to the garden of the university. Thanks to the perfect whether, everything looked much better decorated. The flowers were in bloom, everybody was happy, every graduate had their own custards of groups, taking pictures with their fellow classmates and parents… and he's standing there, looking at the people while standing beside the colourful flowers and whatnot—

"Hey, Okazaki!"

"… Yo." He greeted simply back at the blonde, and waved at the girls who were approaching him with flowers, teddy bears, and other typical graduation presents.

"Congratulations, Okazaki-kun," Ryou said with her usual quiet voice, and she handed him a brown teddy bear that was holding a diploma and wearing a black square hat.

"Thanks," He smiled and took it in his hands, "Are you and Hiiragi still fighting? Why aren't you with him? I saw him over there… somewhere," He looked around for the boy, but he was nowhere in sight.

"Don't even bother asking, Tomoya, the first thing she did when she stepped onto the garden was… I don't know, locate him with her—"

"'Love Radar' and gave him flowers and a ki—"

"Onee-chan! Sakagami-san!" Ryou cried out loud as she blushed deeply.

The group laughed. It's been a while they've gathered like this. Who knew that his whole high school 'family' was going to show up? The twins have graduated a semester earlier than he did, Tomoyo's studying in another university out of town, and Sunohara's just… being Sunohara. So, although he acts casual to their visit, the truth is, he actually appreciates it very much. He expected himself to just stand here and take pictures with the guys, and then throw the hats. After that… after all that troublesome work… he can go home and sleep. It doesn't even matter if this is one of the most important moments of his life.

"Hey, come to think of it, where's _your_ girlfriend?" Kyou asked curiously.

"Yeah, I thought for sure that you two would be making out by now."

Ugh. Stupid Sunohara.

Tomoyo backed up the curiosity, "Heard you two are going to go on a vacation after you graduate. So where is it going to be?"

"Obviously, judging from the Ichinose family background, they're going somewhere grand. Like Paris or Sydney or something…" Kyou said, "Oh, hold this," She handed the flowers to him, "Grats—and where is she anyway?"

Tomoya took the flowers with his other hand, resting the bundle in his chest for support. "I don't know, I guess she's coming. Must be the traffic or something."

The group exchanged stares. He doesn't sound a bit concerned, at all. When Kotomi was gone he's always acting as if he's lacking something, as if a part of him is missing. He would stare at his phone and wait for her to call him when she was in America—all the time. He would doze off whenever they had reunions once a week at the bar, staring into space… thinking about _something._ He was always occupied about her. But now… now, he's being so nonchalant and carefree.

"Uh… Okazaki… did something happen between you two…?" Even Sunohara can tell that he's acting differently.

The group focussed their gaze onto the man. He felt the strange and heavy aura, but he did not care. "Nothing in particular," He simply said.

"But… Kotomi-chan isn't here…" Ryou said hesitantly. It's as if mentioning her name would drive him crazy—which actually did during the past four years.

"Really, nothing happened. We're getting along fine."

"…"

They stayed silent.

"Err… well… let's not be so weird here!" Sunohara said happily. He took out his digital camera, "Get together, guys! Let's take pictures and remember this so, very special day!"

The girls were glad for once that the blonde's existence was of use. Nobody else can break a silence _that_ awkward. "Y-yeah! Let's take some pictures,"

They stood together, the blonde had to ask around the strangers to help take the group shots for them. Then, they took individual shots with the graduate, but they couldn't really smile naturally at the camera. Glimpsing at the corners of their eyes, they could see that the graduate himself wasn't _really_ smiling… he wasn't happy.

"Onee-chan… you're the closest with Kotomi-chan, has she told you anything lately?" She whispered to her sister as Tomoyo helped the boys take photos.

The older twin sighed, "I would tell you if she did, right— Oh my god…."

Ryou looked at the direction her sister was looking at. "Oka… Okazaki-san! Look!"

Tomoya followed her finger, and it lead to—

"Kotomi-chan!" The group yelled, but Tomoya. "Why are you so late? The main character's acting all weird, and it's hard for us to handle!" The girls ran to her, and dragged her towards him.

"S-sorry… I was—"

"It doesn't matter, you're here now, and the scary atmosphere can vanish. Come on, take a picture with him!" Kyou pushed her towards him; she stopped herself before she fell into him.

The two of them stood there. Tomoya looked down at her, but she did not look up.

"Oh… I'll just take these…" Tomoyo grabbed the teddy bear and the flowers, "… so that you two can take proper pictures."

He smiled and handed the junior the gifts, "Thanks,"

"…"

"Holy crap, don't just stand there! Do something!" Kyou said in frustration.

"You two are lovers, aren't you! Hug or something!" Sunohara yelled, "So that I can take a cute couple picture of you two!"

The blonde's demand reminded him of something—something he still kept in his wallet. It was the only picture he ever took with her… it was the picture they took during their first date. He swallowed and leaned forward, his mouth close to her ear, "Just a picture… is fine, right?" His arm slid up her back, and rested on her shoulder. "Thanks for coming," he whispered, and could feel her body loosening up.

"Ready?" Sunohara asked as the couple smiled, "Alright, three, two, one…"

The camera flashed, and Tomoya immediately let go.

"Something's definitely wrong with them," Kyou whispered into Tomoyo's ear, shaking her head.

"Yeah, no doubt."

"Should we… do something?" Ryou said.

"Yes," Kyou smirked, "Can't let anything happen to the cutest couple we've known."

"Mhmm," Tomoyo agreed, nodding her head.

"NOW KISS! KISS YOUR HANDSOME BOYFRIEND, KOTOMI-CHAN!"

Kyou started to rub her chin with her fingers, "… But Youhei's doing everything for us."

"Albeit in a horrible way," Tomoyo crossed her arms, "Look at all the attention he's attracting,"

The girls sighed.

"I… think we should help him out…" Ryou suggested. Surprisingly, her sister agreed to her unusual comment and Tomoyo smiled slyly at her.

"Gee, Kotomi-chan, maybe you should kiss him, it is his graduation after all. You didn't bring any gifts, so shouldn't you make it up for a kiss?" The older twin said in her usual canny tone.

Tomoyo nodded her head heavily, "Yeah… even the shy Ryou went over to kiss her boyfriend before coming over to see Okazaki…"

Ryou frowned at the junior's comment, but supported their words, "Yes, Kotomi-chan… you should probably at least give him a kiss…"

Sunohara grinned. "KISS HIM! KISS HIM! KISS HIM!"

The girls clapped to his chanting rhythm, and joined in to chant with him. "Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him!"

Kotomi blushed and fiddled with her hands. She was clearly embarrassed. Everybody was looking at them. She looked up at him, and he had a rare, straight face.

"Kiss him! Kiss him—"

She turned towards him, she just wanted them to stop.

"Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him—"

He became surprised.

"Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him! Kiss him—"

She took a step forward, tiptoed, and lightly pecked him on the cheek.

_Snap._

"T-there! S-stop it, you guys!" The girl turned away to avoid looking at the group.

"Ugh." The girls grunted.

"That was all!" Sunohara blurted. "Damn it, Okazaki, you kiss her then!"

Tomoya spun his face towards the blonde, glaring at him. _Can't you tell that I can't!_ His mind was screaming at his oblivious friend. But obviously, he doesn't understand. So he transferred the glare towards the girls… but it seemed like they were immune to it.

"Stop looking at us, just kiss her already." Kyou said cockily.

He frowned, and turned back at the girl. "Well," He whispered, "let's just get this over with…"

She gasped, "Tomoya-ku—"

He grabbed her shoulders, interrupting her with a gentle kiss, touching her so lightly it didn't feel like she was kissing _him_.

"Yeah!" Sunohara cheered as he started to click his camera, snapping at different angles as if he were a professional photographer.

"Aw, that's cute," Tomoyo smiled. Everybody nodded their head happily.

He closed his eyes as the kiss got deeper; she granted him entrance long before she realized it, and he tilted his head to the side so that he could reach in and explore more of her. His arms slowly circled around her small body, yet she did not hug back. The girl's eyes were shut as well, and she couldn't control herself… she wanted this, but a part of her body is rejecting the pleasure. She is enjoying this, she wants this, she can't stop herself, she wants to push him away—but she is kissing him back; her tongue dancing feverishly with his'.

"Aye, that's hot," Kyou gave a daring comment. Everybody nodded their head, slowly and in awe this time, "So that's what they do when they're alone…"

"I'm sure… it's more than this…" Ryou whispered to herself.

"Oh, so I assume you and Kappei do the same—or more?" Her sister teased.

"I—!"

"Shh! Don't ruin their moment… I think they're kind of… making up now…?" Tomoyo whispered.

Sunohara started to scratch his head, turning away from the couple that was still locked in their lustful kiss, "Uh… this is kind of turning me on…"

"Shut up and continue to take pictures." The older twin ordered.

Tomoya knew he had to control himself, he knew he can't go too far, but he can't help it. He wants so much of her—

"_You simply…"_

"_Kotomi…"_

"… _Can't be honest with me," she knows that he loves her too much. _

"_That's not true, I—"_

"_Tomoya-kun," she pulled up her bra, but couldn't do much with the torn tanktop. She pushed him away and walked up the stairs, "I don't want to see you anymore,"_

"…"

"_Please, don't look at me…"_

"_I—"_

"_Don't talk to me!"_

"_Kotomi…"_

"_Please," she turned around, looking at him sadly, "We… need to separate for a while…"_

Oh god, but he wants her so much. He can't stop himself. He can't… not look at her. He wants to touch her, smell her, taste her, and… penetrate her… He tilted his head to the other side, hoping it would give him deeper access into her. "Kotomi…" he groaned into her mouth.

She opened her eyes and looked around her. Strangers, other graduates—her friends were all staring at them. A shiver went down her spine and as if he gave her that feeling, she pushed him away with force. "S…stop it…"

The distance between them was only a metre apart, but it looked to him as if she was miles and miles away… it's as if he will never be able to reach her.

The girl brought her hands to her chest, and clenched them. She turned her head away from him, "I'm sorry…"

"Kotomi-chan…" The girls called in unison.

"Everyone, I'm so sorry…" She started to run, she ran farther and farther, until she blended into the crowd.

The group slowly turned back to look at him. He was clearly upset, troubled… frustrated. His fists clenched, he gritted his teeth and shut his eyes tightly. She ran away from him… at such an important event, she ran away. She showed up, but she ran away in the end—all because of him. He's out of control; he's a lustful, sex-hungry, horny bastard. She ran away…

"Okazaki…" The blonde broke his troubled thoughts, "we'll… go for a drink later—you know, to celebrate your graduation, how's that?"

Tomoya looked up, the girls smiled at him kindly, and so did his best friend. A bit of the heavy weight in his heart dropped; he was beginning to feel much better. "Thanks guys," He gave them a small smile, "… but I'm not going to drink anymore."

* * *

"Tomoya, this party thing is for you, aren't you going to sing?" Kyou said into the microphone, as if speaking to an audience in the concert. In the end, it was she who decided where to go for the night, and she picked karaoke. Because of that, she's taken advantage of this and has been singing a marathon of songs, hip-hop, R&B, rock… sing-a-long-songs, medleys… she hogged the microphone for the whole night.

She chucked the microphone in his chest, "No, just sing," He smiled at her.

The lavender hair girl sighed. He never smiled at her like that before, which made her worry even more. "Alright, then," but there isn't anything she can do.

"Hey, Ryou…" Kappei whispered into his girlfriend's ear, "You made me ditch the guys to come here… but… it feels so weird…"

"Shh," She insisted, "Are you implying that you would much rather spend time with your friends than with me?"

"Well, no… but this is a graduation party, so… like…" He kept his voice down.

"I know, I know…" Ryou said, "But please, just…"

He sighed, "Alright, then. Kyou-san, Ryou and I will have a duet!" He suddenly became cheerful.

His girlfriend blinked. "Eh…?"

"Oh, yeah! I've never heard my own little sister sing before. She always says that she's too shy and stuff…"

"Onee-chan! N-no… wait!"

Tomoyo ignored the quarrelling threesome, and kept glancing at the time in her phone.

"Hey, you really did call her, right?"

She glared at the blonde, "Yes I did… but she's running late…"

"… I don't even think she's going to come,"

She couldn't help it but to agree. Judging from what had happened earlier in the afternoon, she also doubts that the girl is going to come. She took one last look at the time, and then she flipped her phone closed, placing it gently down on the glass coffee table. "Man, Okazaki sure looks troubled…"

"Should we uh… try to cheer him up or something?"

"You know that nothing's going to work, right?" She answered with an obvious question. The two continued to observe him. He's been sipping onto the same drink for the past hour, but the liquid remained to be the same amount in the cup. He's looking uninterestedly into the karaoke screen; Kappei and Ryou are already on the mini-stage, singing away. Kappei was singing quite easily, while Ryou was singing hesitantly; she was almost murmuring into the microphone.

Time passed, everybody in the room has gone up and sung. Everybody but Tomoya. He kept rejecting their offer, saying that listening to their horrible voices was enough. They're glad that he's still able to joke around, but it's obvious that he's still unhappy.

Until suddenly, the door opened, everybody but Tomoya looked up.

"Kotomi!" They called happily.

He snapped his head up, his eyes widening with confusion.

"Sorry I'm so late, I was just—"

"It's okay! Just… just sit down—sit here, sit here!" Sunohara scooted over, pointing to the spot in between him and Tomoya, "Come on!"

She looked hesitant at first, but then she smiled weakly and walked towards the open seat.

"Kotomi-chan, do you want to sing?" Ryou offered, handing her the microphone.

"N-no… it's alright, I'll listen to you guys,"

To prevent any unnecessary pushing around that would lead to minor arguments, Ryou simply smiled and shrugged her shoulders. She handed the microphone to her boyfriend, urging him to sing a song to break the silence.

"This certainly is troublesome…" Kyou whispered to her junior.

She nodded, "Perhaps it would have been better if we didn't call her… the air has gotten so much heavier since she walked in…"

They listened to Kappei sing… somewhat horribly, Sunohara giving mocking comments to him once in a while, only to get jabbed back by Ryou's typical shy tone who wishes to support her boyfriend. Thanks to those two, there was at least something to look at—other than the terrible choice of song the singer has chosen (the lyrics to the song related to breaking up thoughts and problems).

Suddenly, Tomoya put down his drink—it was finally half finished, and stood up. "I'm… just going to the washroom," He said, and walked out of the room. The gang was definitely concerned, but they were more worried about his girlfriend's reactions. They all turned to her as he walked out, but she continued to listen to the singer.

"Arghh! You two piss me off!" Kyou suddenly cried. She stood up and knelt in front of the girl, "Kotomi, he's been acting so weird—you two have been acting _so freaking _weird! Can't you just talk it over!"

"Yes, Kotomi-chan, we think so too…" Ryou added.

"Kotomi… go look for him…" Tomoyo said.

Kappei stepped down the mini-stage, and walked towards her, "Ichinose-san, I haven't properly introduced myself, but I'm Hiiragi Kappei, Ryou's boyfriend." They exchanged bows, "I know that coming from a person you just met… you would think this has nothing to do with me, but… I know of your backgrounds—Ryou told me how you met, how much you two were in love, and how cute you two were… so, I just want you to know that never have I seen Okazaki like this,"

"…"

"I know that you weren't here for the past four years, and if I were him, I'd be so emo," Kotomi could see at the corner of her eye that Ryou was very touched, "But today… and for the past two weeks, he's been _very_ different."

"Kotomi-chan… it's true…" Sunohara said.

Tomoyo reached for her hand, "Go look for him,"

She breathed in deeply, her head slowly moving up, "Kyou-chan," she looked at her, "… what should I do?"

Kyou wasn't surprised that she called to her, for some reason. She smiled and said, "Kotomi, what do you _want_ to do?"

She smiled back and stood up, "Thank you, everyone," and she walked out of the room.

They watched as the door closed. Everybody sighed in unison.

"Whoaaaaaaaa—" Sunohara called out loud.

"Man, I didn't even know I can sound that wise…" Kappei said proudly.

Kyou clicked her tongue, "Now I know that my sister's got herself a very good guy," The younger twin blushed.

"Well, here's to hope that the other couple will work out their problems… but why do you think they even fought in the first place?" Tomoyo wondered.

"Funny, I was thinking of the same thing." The blonde said mockingly.

"Onee-chan, why did Kotomi-chan suddenly… called to you?"

Kyou shook her head, narrowing her eyebrows, "Hm, I don't know, but the reason they're fighting should be…" she grabbed her drink, sipping on it thirstily, "… something big."

* * *

Kotomi ran and ran, through the narrow hallways she glanced into each and every room through the small windows. She kept asking herself, _why would he enter these random doors?_ –She doesn't know, but she did it anyway because she wants to see him. She wants to tell him… she wants to forgive him. It's given that he cannot stop himself from being aggressive whenever she becomes distant, but that's only because that's the way he is. Right now, she knows that she is merely giving herself excuses. Two weeks ago, she said earnestly that unless he can control himself, they need to separate. But now—now, _she_ can't control_ herself_.

Seeing the men's washroom, she burst into it. "Tomoya-kun!" The men present in the room freaked out. Some quickly finished with their business and zipped up their pants, not even bothering to wash their hands and exit the room. Some hid inside the stalls to hide from this… woman. She ignored their looks, and walked disappointingly out of there. "Tomoya-kun…" Her feet brought her to a door, her hands unconsciously opened them. _Oh, the stairs._ She sighed and walked inside. Perhaps she can find peace in here. Perhaps she can think over what exactly is going through her mind here. She had a choice to walk up the stairs, or down the stairs. She chose to walk up… maybe a fresh breath of air on the rooftop would be best for her right now.

As she walked higher, she sees a man—_him_ there, sitting on the steps, leaning on the metal handles of the staircase. Is this happiness? Is she delighted that she finally found him? She couldn't smile, but she felt something in her stomach. Tears were forming in her eyes, but she wasn't sad either. Naturally, she walked over and sat next to him. Kotomi was surprised that the light sleeper did not wake up from her presence, but she didn't care. This was even better. The girl leaned closer, so that she could see him…

He looked dead tired. His eye bags were huge, she did not recall him having those two weeks ago.

_Two weeks._

The time they've separated. As kind as she was, she allowed him to continue living in her house, but they did not sleep on the same bed, in the same room. He slept downstairs. They also have not seen each other for a while, for he wakes up early for classes, returns late… most likely because he thinks it's best if they don't see each other. Even if he does return early, she wouldn't be home. She would be out, doing her scientist research at a university out of town—a job she's been offered since long before she graduated.

His facial hair wasn't shaved properly. She could feel the roughness as she ran the back of her hand against his cheek. Kotomi closed her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder. It was a wonder that he's still not awake from that. He must be really, really tired… in many ways. "Tomoya-kun…"

She could hear him breathe lightly.

"Are you awake?"

No answer.

_That's good._

"Tomoya-kun," She started, "You always praise me, you always say that I'm perfect… you always say that I am the best woman in the world, but…" She took his hand in his lap, "… I am not like that. I'm selfish, I'm a hypocrite, I'm… not perfect. I wanted us to separate, but now…"

She looked up at his sleeping face.

"I… I don't know—I want us to be back together, but the inside of me keeps telling me… I can't forgive you for what you have done…"

"Then why did you let me stay in the house?" She gasped at the sudden low voice, "Why did you come to the graduation ceremony? Why didn't you push me away when I kissed you? Why did you come here? Kotomi, why… don't you just let me go—"

"I can't do it! I don't want to do it…!"

He gave a sigh of relief. She still loves him—he's assured of that. The problem is still…

"You cheated on me," It's like she read his thoughts, "… I can't forgive you."

He wrapped his arm around her figure, "But you already have,"

"Tomoya—"

"Or why would you be here?"

"No… I can't—"

"Kotomi," He cut her off, embracing her, "Can we start over?"

"…"

"You told me that I'm everything you have—"

"Tomoya-kun," She stopped him, "It's because you're everything I have, that's why I can't forgive you. You're… my childhood, my guardian, my lover, my reason for… being _here_. Yet… you betrayed me. It's as if my life—I don't…"

At that moment, he realized.

"… This insecurity I'm feeling, it's as if… I can't trust anybody in the world anymore…" Her voice was choking up, and he tightened his grasp around her.

He doesn't know what to say. Apologizing? He's done that a hundred times. Saying sorry doesn't mean anything. He started to rub her back, and slowly… slowly, she began to sob, her body shaking. He could feel his heart retracting, he could feel _her_. "Kotomi… I…"

"I'm… when I saw Furukawa-san, I wanted to yell at her, I wanted to… kill her… Tomoya-kun," Her arms slowly encircled around his waist, "I want you… all to myself… because you're my life. Because I'm selfish…"

She's like a child. She's a dependent yet independent, strong yet weak, caring yet jealous child. The amount of jealousy she has towards Nagisa is beyond the scale—anybody but the girl herself can tell. Tomoya began to see a series of flashbacks as the girl wept; from their reunion in the library to sending her off to New York, and then to seeing her again all broken in a club to now… seeing her all helpless… all because of him.

"Tomoya-kun… I don't know what to do…" She cried, "Kyou-chan asked me what I wanted to do… I was thinking: I want to see Tomoya-kun, I want to tell him I forgive him, I want to be with him again,"

He ran his fingers along her smooth hair.

"But once I saw you here, all the words in my head disappeareded—and then I… I can only picture you and Furukawa-san in bed, doing what we do… then I don't know what I want anymore…"

He understood all that she's saying. He understood but he does not know how to express it. The insecurity she's feeling is too great; she's experienced too much. If he were to put himself in her position, he wouldn't forgive him either: getting raped at the age of seven, parents dying in the same year, the one and only friend leaving her during the times when she needs someone most, and finally… getting betrayed by the person she loves most… who else can live a life as traumatizing as this? He would kill him if he were the girl.

She continued to sob into his chest, her body still shaking weakly.

"Kotomi, you're wrong…" He pulled him gently away from himself, so that he could look at her, "The selfish one is me."

"Tomoya-kun…"

"How can I cheat on the perfect woman?"

"I'm… not…"

"You are. You are more perfect than anything in the world. Getting to know you was the purpose of my life, yet I ruined the opportunity, I ruined this… gift. You shouldn't forgive me, and neither should I forgive myself. But for now…"

Her hands slowly moved up to his face, she leaned closer into him.

"For now… I just want to start over with you…"

He closed his eyes, the girl's lips touched his', and he parted his mouth slightly to encourage her to kiss deeper. She did, indeed, her tongue driving in with so much force it proved how desperate she is. Her arms wrapped around his neck, her fingers running freely through his dark hair, exciting him. Immediately, he hoisted himself up the stairs, pulling the girl up with him, and backed her up against the nearest wall.

He released her lips, their faces still so close, he looked straight into her eyes. "Are you scared?" He rested his elbows at the sides of her head, trapping her, so that she had nowhere else to go or look.

She did not avoid eye contact, however, "No," Replying with confidence in her voice, "I'm not afraid." She is not afraid of this lying, cheating man.

Tomoya was glad. At least… this is another way of saying that she forgives him, although it isn't completely. "That's good," He attacked her lips, thrusting his tongue into her, she opened her mouth only slightly—as if toying with him, while pulling his body closer to herself. Much like earlier in the afternoon, their kiss deepened as they kissed longer. He moved his head around to find proper and better angles, while she adjusted to his movements, as she tiptoed to reach into him.

"Mmm…" The girl moaned into his mouth, and he released her to move down to her neck. Naturally, she tilted her head up so that he could get more of her, and so that she could feel more of him. His arms slowly slid down her body, his large hands massaging her shoulders briefly and then moved down to her breasts, cupping them through her thin orange tanktop. Experimenting with her reactions, he kissed her lightly under her ear, and then sucked on her collarbone hard. She whimpered in pleasure, arching her back, encouraging him for more.

His hands continued to roam around her figure, tracing her curves, admiring her slimness. He left a hand holding onto her slim waist, the other one moving downwards under her white skirt, pushing her panties apart and rubbed against her wetness.

"Hnn—!" She gasped, her body sending her spasms all over, "Tomoya-kun…!"

The man pulled away from her neck, "Shh… it's okay…" He pushed his middle finger into her slit, the nostalgic feeling of her walls grabbing onto him gradually returning—

"Tomoya… kun…!" She moaned. Oh, how he loved her helpless, cute, _whispery_ voice. Especially when she says _his_ name…

He looked straight at her—she had a… sad, melancholic… _horny_ look. He started to move his finger, curling, rolling, checking if that weird bump was still there. He really does not want to hurt her; she has told him since forever that she disliked pain, yet he ignored the warning. And as if it would kill him if he does not enter her, he raped her, again and again. Four years ago he did it—_nearly,_ and in the present, he did it again, almost… almost killing her.

She bucked her hips forward, the action surprising the man because he has yet to finish checking if she was still hurt. The girl was looking at him, signalling him, screaming to him that she was desperate, that she wanted him. But then, "Tomoya-kun…" Her arms moved up to hang around his neck, "… must our relationship be like this?"

"…?"

"Everything we do… all we do is sex," She pulled him closer so that she could rest on his shoulder.

Yes, all they do is sex. When you put Okazaki Tomoya together with Ichinose Kotomi, you get sex, and nothing else.

_Nothing?_

He doesn't know how to respond, so he added another finger into her, making scissoring motions with them. The action nearly bringing her to her peak, she threw her head back, crying his name. But he stopped just as she was about to hit it. The girl looked back at him, clearly disappointed. He smirked, "But do you like it? Do you want it to be like this?"

"I…"

He started to move his fingers again, "… Do you?"

"Tomoya-kun…!"

Pulling his fingers out of her, he zipped down his flyers quickly, releasing himself. The girl looked down at him; he was throbbing with life—a sight she has not seen for two weeks… Tomoya positioned himself in front of her, rubbing against her core, teasing her. "Kotomi…" He inserted the tip of his member into her, the tip only, while his free hand pinched her swollen bud lightly, "… do you?"

"Hahh…!" The girl squealed, her grip on his shoulders and her walls tightening, "Yes…! Yes…! Tomoya-kun…!" She wanted to thrust herself into him, but he was holding onto her waist, preventing her from moving.

"This is you and I," He entered her so painfully slow, "This is why we're so… unique,"

Inside her completely now, Kotomi gasped desperately for air, panting so heavily, the sounds she made turned herself on.

"I can only show you my love through sex…" He explained, "… but did you realize?"

Pumping into her slow at first—he sped up and released her waist, she instantly started to rock her hips.

"You're the same," His tone flat.

"Ahh!" She cried when he suddenly thrust harder.

He grabbed onto her hips, giving her strength to thrust into him, "I see your real side when we have sex: the way you scream… the way you moan my name… the way you come… it tells me everything."

She bit onto her lips, remembering that they are still at a public place, and that her voice was echoing in the entire staircase.

"So yes, this is… how o-our relationship… i-is like…" He stated his conclusion, and he could swear to god, the girl was… smiling when he finished…

* * *

"Should we… go look for them? They've been gone for a long time—"

"There's no need," Kyou interrupted her sister, entering the karaoke room, smirking, "They've made up, I think."

"… You think? So you're not sure…?" Tomoyo said suspiciously.

"Well, they're… kind of… y'know." She said as she sat down, taking the song list in her hands and flipping through the pages casually, "So who's next? Can I sing yet?"

The girls and Kappei looked at her, receiving a small wink from the elder twin. The action gave them shivers, but they understood. "Ah, I see. Um… Sunohara was next, so—"

"Youhei, you sing horrible, so just give up the spot and let me sing," It was a demand.

"No! What the hell! –And by the way, so… they're okay now?"

"Just give me the microphone!"

* * *

"Ahh! Ahh! Tomoya— aah! Tomoya-kun…!"

"Ugh… s-shit…!" He released into her, shooting into her walls, triggering her orgasm—a feeling both of them have not felt for… in their case, quite a long while. They stood there, catching their breaths while looking at each other. She released his neck and cupped his sweaty cheek, smiling, and then collapsed.

He caught her easily, slowly sitting her down with him. He rested her in his chest, and remained silent—he has yet found his place back in the universe.

"Tomoya-kun…" She called weakly.

"… Yeah?"

"Should we… at least tell the others where we are? They should be worried…"

He chuckled, "I don't really want to move right now…"

"Just… call them…"

"And tell them that we've just had sex in public area?"

"N-no!" She gasped, but was happy that he is once again able to joke around, "… Tell them that we've…"

Tomoya pulled her up and leaned into her, "We've…?"

"… Tomoya-kun… if you think I've forgotten that you cheated—hahh… ahh! N… no…!"

She was cut off by his fingers, which were pinching onto her clit and rubbing her folds. "I haven't, and I never will,"

Kotomi snapped opened her eyes to look at him. "Never…?" Her face was so cute—she was so frightened, "Tomoya-kun… you're going to remember Furukawa-san— unnghh!"

He smiled. "Yeah," Instantly, tears formed in her eyes. He decided not to go too far whenever they reached this subject, "… because if I remember her, I will know how fortunate I am. If I remember her, I will know that no such woman can be compared to my cute, pretty, _angelic_ girlfriend… and that I was an idiot to cheat on her."

She pouted and looked away, "I-it's not like I've forgiven y-you or something…!"

_Tsundere!_

"That's fine," He said simply, and then thrust a finger into her again, earning him an erotic moan from her, "… I'll just make you forgive me."

"Tomoya-kun… not here…" She whispered.

He smiled, "But you can't even move,"

"Carry me home," She suddenly said, "Tomoya-kun, I want you to carry me home. Is that okay?"

How can he say no! The sweet smile on her face, her puppy eyes… _her_. He smirked and gathered his strength, lifting her up, "Alright then," He was still a bit dizzy from the sex they had, but he can carry her. He can carry her home, "Let's go."

_He can carry her for life._

_

* * *

_

I've never updated this soon before!

And, I don't know about you, but I liked this chapter the most.  
More to come… soon!

EDIT: Never mind. This story's over lol. The end.


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